Try as I might, I seem to have less tolerance for my skids’ personalities than my own DD11. I have struggled with this and I have come to realize the following:

I am an introvert. I value self-reflection and self-discipline and gravitate towards people who are comfortable enough in their own skin to not have an insatiable need to be surrounded by noise (talking, yelling, mindless conversations, singing, TV’s, videos, etc.). My skids (SD12, SD8) are extroverts who routinely suck the life out of me. Extroverts are great. Introverts are great. Combining them under one roof 24/7 can be trying when the extroverts disregard direct requests (“I need a break from talking now, I’d like to finish cooking dinner alone”) and indirect requests (mindless, “ah-huh” responses to their chatter followed by me tripping over them as I walk away) are ignored.

I love big dogs. Big dogs I’ve raised have manners, are lovingly disciplined, and do not bark incessantly. Because people are sometimes afraid of big dogs, I make sure mine are respectful and easy to be around. I’ve raised my own three children (DD25, DS23, DD11) like I’ve raised my big dogs: lovingly with boundaries and expectations of good behavior and accomplished goals. DH (and BM when she was alive) raised his/their children like the little yippy frou-frou dogs I've encountered in my life (no offense to responsible/loving owners of frou-frou dogs in the world!). The SDs have always been physically-structurally small and cute girls. Their cuteness is the most substantial thing they offer the world, and pretty much what their parents expected from them. Not much else. And they revel in it. They are constantly under-foot (in the kitchen, follow me to the bathroom, on the couch, etc.), they are never quiet (talktalktalktalktalk barkbarkbarkbark), they make messes/piddle anywhere and everywhere they feel like it (SDs don’t actually pee on the floor, but they constantly mark the house in other ways), they are not easily trained and resistant to basic rules, and since they are “sooooo itty-bitty wittle and sooooo cuddly cute,” no one expects them to have boundaries or manners. Therefore others (family, school, friends) excuse the frou-frou dog behaviors that would never be tolerated if it was a 150 lb. German Shepherd Dog.

Frou-frou dogs and extroverts of the world help make life interesting. Introverts and big quiet dogs of the world are valuable too. And it’s ok to prefer one group over the other. That’s what I’m realizing.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, I just had to get it off my chest.