With worsening COVID metrics in my state, it's only starting to get more and more dangerous to have what is essentially a stranger with unknown exposure (BM doesn't care) going back and forth. My soon to be two kids are not exactly low risk, and I will rain hellfire if SD takes one or both of my children from me.

My husband is starting to understand that having no real bubble or control over exposure is a real health risk to young children, and with a now semi-permanent income loss, renewing the lease on this house is getting unrealistic. The burden of his child support is also harming my credit, which is forcing us to split up our finances. So we are going to split up temporarily to protect the kids. We are filing for legal separation, but that doesn't require us to get divorced right away or ever. 

He just signed on an apartment near his job, and is agreeing to video visits only with the bab(ies) in exchange for me agreeing to no child support (even if it is just me returning it under the table). I will be living with my bio(s) in a guesthouse owned by one of my relatives in my home state. We moved out last week, and my husband is moving next week, with me going back for a few boxes of things, mostly summer clothes.

Sorry I couldn't have a happier update.