I've been gone from StepTalk for a few weeks now - just busy busy busy! We have finally started putting together our wedding plans, we had a vacation, and I started a new job. Now we are getting back into the daily grind and I have time to vent again! However, I think it's good to take a healthy vacation from venting sometimes. Here's my update on all things vent-a-licious in my life as a SM.

1. Fiance checked out SS2's teeth (he's 3 this month) one day after not seeing him for the weekend and said they were disgusting. So he calls BM simply to ask her when the next dentist appointment is. She immediately gets snotty with him and says that SS already had an appointment in February and that he only needs to go once a year. DF explains to her that he was just wondering because they looked pretty grimy, and asked if it's okay that he's concerned and asked her a question? BM says, "Well Son won't let me brush his teeth so I gave up long ago." So she blatantly admitted to DF that she doesn't brush his teeth or help him at all with it...because he won't let her? We have him brush his teeth and then we go in there and brush some too. He doesn't like it but he lives with it. Then BM also told DF that when SS went to the dentist in February that he wouldn't even sit there for the dentist so they didn't even get to do any cleaning for him. So why would she tell DF that he wouldn't need another dentist appointment if she knows the first one nothing happened? (PS - Insurance is not a problem because BM works for an insurance company, DF asked her if the cost is covered and she said it is, so it's not a money issue) BM has the patience of a two-year-old and lets her own two-year-old walk ALL OVER HER. The exact same situation as the nail clipping thing that I blogged about before...he won't "let her" cut his nails so she just lets them grow and grow and grow.

2. BM went to a really big amusement/ride/water park two times this summer with her friends, then went home and showed the kids pictures of her fun weekend. She told them that maybe we will take them there since she's already spent so much money going there this summer already. WTF?

3. SD5 was drinking grape juice last week and said she didn't like it because it tastes like wine. We asked her how she knows what wine tastes like, and she proceeded to tell us that Mommy always lets her have some. Obviously that might be an exaggeration and maybe she's skewing the truth so she doesn't get in trouble for 'stealing' a sip...but we just don't know and that's the part that is annoying. We just don't trust BM.

4. Constant, constant, constant battle daily to get SS3 to put his own socks on, shoes on, take his pants up and down, etc...every day he gets to our house after being at BM's it's like re-starting from 1 1/2 year old age. Cries and cries and cries because his pants are stuck under his butt and he won't stick his thumbs in the waistband to pull them up. I understand this is a tricky subject and is completely normal for kids this age to be frustrated, but that first day transition just tells us so much that BM just does everything for him the minute he starts to cry and wine.

5. BM keeps posting on Facebook how her kids are so bad that she's been putting them to bed at 6:30pm. There have been 3 incidents in the last two weeks where she's made a comment about that and has said that they are already in bed becasue they were so bad and the timestamp on it is right around there. So instead of parenting the problem she tries to get them to sleep so she doesn't have to deal with it. GRRRR

6. SD5 told me that Mommy wants all her clothes back. I said "ALL of your clothes?" and SD5 started listing a bunch of different colors of pants or skirs or whatever. I said well if Mommy wants some clothes she should give us a list and we'll get them back to her. Inside I was fuming that she would have SD5 be the go-between on something so silly when it could easily be solved by a simple phone call. Then SD5 continues by saying, "Mommy says she never gets back the clothes she buys for me from other people's houses!....But maybe she shouldn't have me wear those things when she knows I am coming to your house, right?" The 5 year old has more common sense than the BM! Thank the lord! When I buy 'special' clothes for the kids that we want to keep at our house for whatever reason, we just don't send them to BM's house with those on...common sense, right?

Okay that's all today folks. As always feel free to give me some pointers/ideas.