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Vengeance/excessive court

Stepmom_C's picture

Submitted by Stepmom_C on Sun, 02/26/2017 - 10:56pm

Well, DH just got served papers again. We officially have a case in both the appellate court (one BM lost) and now another one (6th one) in family court. Is there no end?? What's sad is it's only vengeance- DH has had custody for 13 years and the teen ran away to the "no rules" lifestyle. Hard to know what to do but it's so out of control. Anyone else dealt with someone that constantly uses court to hurt you? Even when you are the stable home? Sure hurts as the stepmom who did the most for SD.... she got a new cell and hasn't contacted us in 8 weeks. BM won't let her... I know DH could go force her to come home but she's 16- what would you do??

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Stepmom_C's picture

Submitted by Stepmom_C on Mon, 02/27/2017 - 6:15am

She wants the child support. 5 months ago the judge asked BM if she wanted anymore custodial time with SD. Her reply was " I've thought a lot about it but no. Every other weekend is good." That's what's sad, she never really wanted her in the first place.

Acratopotes's picture

Submitted by Acratopotes on Mon, 02/27/2017 - 2:19am

turn of her cell phone.... if she wants to live with BM, then let her go, change the CO... if DH can proof BM never paid CS for 13 years, court might just slap him with very low CS.... or none (at least with us it works this way)

Then leave SD with her mother, as soon as BM won, their little honeymoon will be over and SD will run back to your house, this is where DH have to tell her - NO.. you wanted to live with mum, you will stay there, end of it.

SM12's picture

Submitted by SM12 on Mon, 02/27/2017 - 8:39am

My former SD (17 at the time) did the same thing to us. We had custody for 7 years, BM had not even spoken to SD is 4 years and suddenly she comes back around. Within a month of coming around SD ran away to live with BM in another state. Our attorney said there was nothing we could do about it since she would be 18 before it even got to court. BM promised SD a car, her own apartment and freedom. No responsible parent can complete with that. The only blessing was, it didn't take SD long to figure out that was not really a great idea. Immediately after SD graduated, she can crawling back to her BD. BM again was out of the picture for around 7=8 years until two years ago. Again SD runs off and moves out of state to live near her. BM was throwing money at SD like crazy. And again, one year after SD moves back. Sadly, in the meantime, BM managed to blow up any relationship I had with SD.
I decided to get off that crazy train and left it where it was, no where.

I know It is in your instinct to grab the child and force her to come back. Save your money. She is too old and the courts will go so slow the SD will be 18 before you get a decision. Its time she makes her own mistakes now.

Stepmom_C's picture

Submitted by Stepmom_C on Mon, 02/27/2017 - 9:44am

You are right- my first instinct is to run and get her. Unfortunately in my state support goes until 19 years so I think this will drag on into court. But I think I'll have to let her go and she will have to deal with the consequences of her decision.