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I AM STILL ALIVE!!!

step mom of 1's picture

Submitted by step mom of 1 on Fri, 08/03/2007 - 2:42pm

I am sorry that I have been absent lately I have been enjoying my pregnancy. No more morning sickness. HOORAY!!!! I have been shopping up a storm with my parents and ss. Who has been enjoying the fact that he will be having a new baby brother or sister in January. But there is the other issue at hand the BM, who still says that ss will be left out. I take him to ALL my doctor appts, he comes shopping with me. He helps pick out paint for the nursery, he evens gets to give he say in baby names( even the ones I don't what to hear). So can someone please tell me if it sounds like I am not worried about this child that is already here. DH says that she is just doing this to get under my skin cause we asked one of his sisters to be Godmother to this baby, remember she was the one that wanted that job title. Well to make a long story short one the days that Dh cannot make it to our first time parents meeting I bring my mother, whom yes has had 2 kids but we are very grown. Bm told Dh that she would like to be at them meeting with me. This is what he told her, You must be stupid or on drugs there is no way in hell or over my dead body do you need to be by my wife and new baby, this baby has nothing to do with you, our kid may be his/her big brother but you have nothing with this child the minute I find out that you went anywhere near this baby in a meeting or when this baby is born I will put harassment charges on you them go for custody of our child together. He then told her when the baby is born that ss grandparents will pick him up and bring him to the hospital after the baby is born, adn they will keep him if that is what he(ss) wants. Now I feel bad for her, stupid I know I guess it is hormones but I think he was to mean. Please give me feedback and tell me that I am crazy for feeling sorry for her.

Comments

stepup's picture

Submitted by stepup on Fri, 08/03/2007 - 2:53pm

Your DH is doing the right thing by setting boundaries NOW before the baby is born. He has it absolutely right that this child has NOTHING to do with BM. Nothing. Just because they share one child together does not give her access to YOU or to any children you two have together. And personally, I find it very intrusive for BM to want to be the Godmother or come to parents meetings. She's over stepping some obvious boundaries and DH is doing what he has to to make it clear to her where the lines are drawn. Most people would know these lines instinctively, but apparently not BM. So.. be glad your DH is fighting so hard to protect you and the baby.. thank him.. a lot of DH's wouldn't have enough spine to do so!

And yes.. she's just making those comments about SS feeling left out to bother you. It's one more way to try to control THIS situation (the impending birth) where she has NO control, no say, and no rights. Do what you've been doing and ignore her.

Stepup

wicked step monster's picture

Submitted by wicked step monster on Sat, 08/04/2007 - 6:17am

All I can say is what a wonderful husband you have.
He did the right thing by you.

Anne 8102's picture

Submitted by Anne 8102 on Sat, 08/04/2007 - 6:37am

So congrats to you for having a hubby who will protect his, um, inches. Don't worry about it. Let him deal with it in his own way. She's his cross to bear, not yours. You just sit back and enjoy your family and your pregnancy. Rest easy knowing that your DH is trying to put a protective coccoon around you right now. Don't think twice about the BM. It's a little freaky to me that she even wants to be involved. She sounds like a stalker-in-training.

~ Anne ~

"Love, having no geography, knows no boundaries."
(Truman Capote)

Sebbie's picture

Submitted by Sebbie on Sat, 08/04/2007 - 10:55am

Lovers do not finally meet somewhere, they were with each other all along.

He is doing the right thing setting the boundaries now, and believe me, the day will come when you appreciate him for doing it so early on.

step mom of 1's picture

Submitted by step mom of 1 on Tue, 08/14/2007 - 5:28pm

I have been a little more nice to Dh lately for protecting me. Even SS is defending me(someone check to make sure the sky is not falling LOL). He has told his mother that this is his new brother or sister that she has no say in the matter. Good for him!! So as of now all is working out perfectly. If only someone could do something about the heat in Louisiana I would be GREAT!!