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About BM's and their messed up priorities

sixxnguns's picture

I didn't want to hijack Dawns blog with my vent....BM sent FSS with dirty clothes this weekend...we have clothes here for him but on Monday he has to go home in clothes from her house and they are all dirty...and once again the underwear are too small...what is she doing the whole time she has him? I removed the small underwear and put them in a Goodwill pile, maybe she'll get a damn clue and buy him new ones! He spent two days(overnights) at a new daycare because she had to go out of town with her friends for a long weekend...she told fiancee to drop FSS off at school on Monday so she wouldn't have to pick him up, well there is no school on Monday..and now he's not only wetting the bed but he's having accidents at daycare and school...where is this woman's brain??!!

Fiancee actually got upset with FSS tonight because of his table manners and I had to break in and stick up for the kid...sheesh, I mean come on, he lives with a woman who doesn't show him anything, she doesn't spend any time with him cause she has to party with her friends..it's not his fault...I am SOOOO tempted to give that woman a piece of my mind already...some people shouldn't be allowed to reproduce!

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sixxnguns's picture

His behaviors still annoy me but I have been trying to work with him on his speech and his table manners, and I know now his behaviors are because his own mother won't pay any attention to him but spoils him with material things...but he avoids me like the plague for some reason, maybe BM told him to stay away from me...I'm lost on that one...I'm not mean to him in any way, I'm only a bit strict because that's how I am with my own daughter

Most Evil's picture

You are making progress even if it doesn't seem that way, with speech and manners.

His mom probably did warn him off, she may feel threatened by you because you are actually parenting the child like she should! Just pretend you don't notice he is avoiding you if you can. It will sink in, even if at the rate of 'water dropping onto stone'!

"Fortune favors the brave" - Virgil

sixxnguns's picture

he spends alot of time at daycare when she's not even at work..she goes out all the time with her friends...it worries me because how is he gonna turn out in a couple years? Is he gonna have anxiety issues or is he gonna turn violent and start acting out...I hope she doesn't think we'll take him in fulltime when he has major issues because I'm not gonna deal with it!

Dawn-Moderator's picture

Your ss's Bm is exactly like my ss's Bm was when I started dating Dh. Hang in there. Fight the good fight. Don't let up. Keep working with ss. We eventually got ss in therapy for the issues that his mother was giving him. That was the first step to Dh getting primary custody of ss. This happened in 2nd grade. So it is possible to make a difference and give your ss a better life.

My ss's Bm did get better as time went on and she tried to keep up with us. She's still the same crappy person underneath and falls down on the job a lot but she's better since she knows what kind of standards we have.

Dawn

stepwitch's picture

I Do I Do I DO I Do I DO I DO I DO 111

Stepwitch
Thank you Disney for portraying a positive image on all stepmothers!!!!

sixxnguns's picture

and her excuse was that she didn't get back into town until 3AM..AKA(Umm..I was partying with my friends all weekend and we had to stay until the bars closed so we didn't get back into town until late and I wanted to sleep late)...so now we are sticking to the visitation agreement the lawyer drew up...she has to be here at 6pm on Sundays ON TIME until further notice...and than tries the "you're taking time away from your son" guilt trip...ya know we'd gladly take him until MOnday but when fiancee is late for work because she can't crawl her ass out of bed she can start picking him up on Sundays...UGH...

stanfordcarson's picture

Thanks for sharing!