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how much is too much for child support

raggedyann1973's picture

DH pays 300 monthly....and I thought that was too much bc SD is 14...but I am reading on some posts that DH pays up to 1,200 monthly....is this for one child? I guess I should stop complaining.

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Asher10's picture

i will never understand why the courts feel it's ok for one child to live off $300 a month but not ok for all children.i understand kids with medical issues cost more to raise but for the average healthy child why do some get $300 while others get $1200?? there HAS to be some sort of formula the determines a close estimate of how much it costs to raise the average,healthy child and whether you make millions a year or 20k a year,you only pay what it would cost to pay for the child's needs not their freaking wants.Oh and child support is only supposed to be HALF the cost of raising a child bc the other parent is responsible for the other half of expenses. so the courts mean to tell us that it costs $1200 PLUS $1200 to raise ONE stinking little brat?? A MONTH??? BULLSHIT.
The court told DH that it costs 2k to raise SD monthly.and since bm is responsible for half her expenses too that means the court feels this ONE child costs 4k a month to raise.meanwhile the kid down the street was deemed worth only 400 a month.
it's so f*cked up.

Asher10's picture

no she shouldn't be depending on charities and neither should the other kids and that's my point about there should be some basic estimate on how much the ACTUAL cost of raising a healthy child is.just because a child doesn't get $1200 a month doesn't mean they're getting toys from donations.with higher incomes comes more taxes also so when suzies dad is paying for her to be a cheerleader and have an ipod bc the judge says she's entitled to that, dad is also paying for poor little johnny to get free meals and free toys because suzies dad is in a tax bracket paying almost half his income to taxes for government funded programs and state funded programs like that.
let's say it costs 600 a month to raise a child.that's what bm and bd should be contributing as a total then.anything above that is them giving in to the childs 'gimme this gimme that'attitude.if bd and bm can't afford that average cost of raising a child that they have to get toys from charity,they shouldn't have been knocking boots having babies in the first damn place.

Asher10's picture

standard of living is BS to me.no child should become accustomed to living the high life in my opinion.it can be gone in a heartbeat.that higher standard of living shouldn't be expected because it isn't promised to be their life forever.they should be accustomed to being an average person with an average income because that's most likely the life they'll be living after the cs is dried up.
that's like when a judge orders a man to continue providing for his ex because standard of living blahblahblah.it sucks.

overit2's picture

Well, if that's not a pretty socialist way of seeing things Wink

Does the same apply to adults? We have class disparity, thereforth different standards of living have been pre-set for the kids. IMO it's not fair to rake someone over the coals but it is in the best interest of the children IMO to continue to have a similar at least way of life then they did prior to a divorce.

z3girl's picture

DH was paying $1000 per month for one child (even while unemployed) as well as it being dictated that he had to set aside an additional $300 per month in her college savings plan. Now that SD is in college, and living on campus, he still has to pay $500 per month in CS and pay 65% of her tuition which is currently $15k per year out of his pocket as long as she keeps her grades up.

Because of this, BM gets to live alone in a newer, 2500 sq ft house and has summers off (works for a school district) while we can barely afford a 1000 sq ft townhouse on two salaries.

$300 is pocket change! (although still an expense...)

mom2five's picture

It is a mathmatical formula. And it depends on the state law. In some states, the amount is based strictly on the non-custodial parent's income. For example, a non-custodial father might be ordered to pay 22% of his income in support. In other states, it's based on the combined income of the parents.

When we were non-custodial, we paid $2,700 a month for two kids. It seemed high, but it was in line with the state guidelines. The kids moved in with us a few years ago. His ex-wife pays us exactly $0 per month in support. Nice, huh? We didn't even ask. We knew we would never see a dime.

raggedyann1973's picture

Actually this is an agreement ex and DH worked out.....I agree that it doesn't take thousands to raise a child per month. I guess I was complaining bc from the time she was in daycare...he paid the entire amount which was $700 or something like that. But I still see that is cheap compared to someof yall's posts.

caregiver1127's picture

The up to $39,100 is not fair as there are many many many people in this country who make less than $18000 a year before tax - so to say that what someone who makes $38,000 and someone who makes $20,000 are in the same money category is not right - in the one instance it would make you almost broke - there is so much poor and poverty in this country that even from 2001 this scale can hardly be applied to families making less than $25,000 before tax which comes to about $19,250 a year after tax and if you divide that by 12 it comes to $1,604 a month and if you divide that by 4 comes to $401 a week. But that would be if you were making $25,000 a year pre tax. With the minimum wage being around $7.25 that comes to $15,080 if you work full time 2080 hours for the year. So after tax you would have about $12,215 divide that by 12 and you get $1,017 a month divided by 4 weeks is $254 so at minimum wage a father working full time and paying $300 a month would take a lot of money from him.

I always found those formulas for raising a child unrealistic - while it looks like it would not be that hard they put in there about the money being pre-taxed and that changes everything once you take out the taxes you are left with not a lot!!

Asher10's picture

everything is based on pre-tax.it's so sickening.i want to scream at someone 'if I HAD the money i made BEFORE taxes,i would be FINE financially you jerks!!'

skylarksms's picture

EXACTLY!

My friend is engaged to a guy (despite my warnings!) that is paying $1200 a month for his kids. What does their BM contribute? Nothing. Zip. She is not working and doesn't even have a car or drivers license. She is constantly complaining on poor they are.

I mean, come on! Supply YOUR $1200 a month (according to court logic - both parents supply 50%), and your family would have PLENTY to live on! And that's for the mother too!!!

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

I could live on $ 1200 a mth. !!! DH is ordered to pay C/S on a 50/50 split because BM was a "SAHM" when she filed.

I always sensed a scam with this. He bought a house, she became accidently pregnant, child was born and less than 2 years later she told him to get out and had filed for divorce. She was given a house, car, and child support.

DH gave in to her demands and threats. I would have told her to bring it on.

According to her version, he was emotionally abusive to her. :?

According to his version, all they were doing was arguing, day and night.

stepsonhatesme's picture

My dh pays over $700/month for 1 kid. I think it's BS when we have him 1/2 the time an BM world full time too

jlot's picture

This is where I think CS is not always fair. Yes, the parent needs to help support the child, but when the child is living 50% at each house, what's fair? I know a couple of really good fathers (my Dh included) who pay so much in child support and have their kid(s) 50% of the time...then when the child(ren) come to the dad's house, he has very little money to do anything fun. Often we hear: My BM got me this or that and look at my new X that my mom got for me...
It would be nice to get you those things (and lots of the time, I bet the CS is paying for it) but the child doesn't see that and things BM is a hero...sigh.

TheBrightSide's picture

Joint custody with 50/50. DH also agreed to pay for all extra curricular and medical. All BM pays for is clothes. We pay $1,100.00 monthly. At least the alimony is done.

caregiver1127's picture

If all you are making is $1200 a month which is the case for some people than 300 is a good amount. I was going to say it depends on what your hubby makes but I see that they did not go to court that like my DH and BM they set an amount (unfortunately our BM wanted a lot more than your BM) our BM does not want us to go to court because she makes a lot of money and we would probably pay less - but yeah you should not complain $300 is rather low but I am sure for people not on this site who only get $75 or $150 a month who are truly poor they would love to get $300. Or there are some women out there whose children's fathers are deadbeats and get nothing. It is all about perspective.

skylarksms's picture

I get $56.00 a month in back support for my DS20. The arrearages is around $23,000. At this rate, I should be paid back in, oh about 35 years or so. Oh, I forgot the interest...make it about 40-45 years.

Oh and I am one of the few BMs who is NOT trying to "stick it" to my son's dad. Courts set the CS at a minimal amount and I never once tried to get it raised. On the other hand, he dodged CS until DS was almost 10 so it is his own fault that there is such a big amount for back support!

Rags's picture

If you pay CS, any is too much. If you get it, no amount is enough. Of course there are some NCPs who gladly support their kids and some CPs who are not interested in sticking it too the X. Kudos to the responsible and reasonable CPs and NCPs.

My SS's SpermIdiot paid $110/mo for 2yrs, $130/mo for 8yrs and for the last 8yrs of the CO he paid $380/mo for one kid.

The amount that the SpermIdiot got away with paying is offensive IMHO. Even at $380/mo it did not come close to covering half of the costs of raising SS each month.

Skid food costs: $200/mo
Skid housing costs: $300/mo
School taxes or tuition: $400/mo
Skid transportation costs: $100/mo
Skid clothing costs: $50/mo
Skid activity/entertainment costs: $100/mo
Skid misc expenses: $100/mo

CS of $110 or $130 or $380/mo: PATHETIC!

SpermIdiot lives rent free in a house his parents own. SpermGrandMa pays for my SS’s visitation travel air fare. SpermGrandMa and SpermGrandPa raise the youngest three SpermIdiot spawn in their home with no help from the SpermIdiot.

Wait for it, wait for it …. and the SpermGrandParents pay the CS that SpermIdiot owes for my SS.

Grrrrr!!! He is such a worthless POS dirt bag idiot toothless moron.

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

Rags*

This.

"Of course there are some NCPs who gladly support their kids and some CPs who are not interested in sticking it too the X."

You got that right! Wink

RaeRae's picture

We get less than $250/mo for FOUR kids. $250. Not each. Total. Why? Because she's the fucking BM.

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

Crayon,

State: " Burn the biodads with child support and take off the debt to the states of giving these women welfare and food stamps."

Financial "tactic" that needs a major overhaul.

z3girl's picture

When SD19 first went to college, BM and DH agreed (verbally and written through an email) that DH only had to pay the $250 per week when SD19 was home from school, and that DH would pay 50% of college tuition. BM even sent a schedule of when she expected to get the money. She then changed her mind and decided to take DH to court and threatened him with incarceration for non-payment of child support even though he paid everything they had agreed on!

The threat of incarceration is what galls me the most...talk about abusing the system! He was not a deadbeat!

Somewhat funny ending...court ordered the child support reduced to pretty much what they agreed on. DH unfortunately has to now pay 65% of the tuition instead, but at least it's all court ordered and she can't ask for a penny more!

RaeRae's picture

The BM in our case grossly inflated DH's income on the temporary order. Since his lawyer sucked, she did not object. He was making around $2000/mo, and ended up owing nearly $900, for 50/50 custody. Needless to say, he couldn't pay. He paid around $200/mo. She called him a deadbeat dad, took him to court for contempt (with the perm. hearing pending, so that was dismissed by the judge, but he filed a counter claim and she was found in contempt for moving kids in with her bf), she tried to file AGAIN to get the $9000 in back child support he 'owed'. She wanted him incarcerated.

Fast forward to Permanent child support/custody hearing, DH gained custody and BM was ordered to pay CS. Judge said her failure to get a job was a bad-faith effort to pay/receive support, so income was imputed on her.

She used to bitch at DH and say "How do you expect me to take care of four kids with only $200/month?" Now the fkn sharmoota isn't paying a dime. We're getting ready to file contempt charges though. Hopefully with her previous contempt in July, the judge knowing how she is, she will go to jail.

RaeRae's picture

Oh and Judge fixed his income records, and that was made retroactive. So Sharmoota did not see the $9000.

totalof4's picture

DH (We) pay $1200 for two skids, but we only receive for my bios $450 for both.

Its based on income... ExH quit his job and was not employed at the time we divorced, and then took a much lower paying job. I should add that he never keeps a job long, so anytime he goes to work, by the time I have dialed the attorneys office to petition the court for more, he quits or gets fired or is off due to a workmans comp claim (of which he has had several) I don't understand why Workmans Comp has not investigated him yet.

Since its based on income here in our state... DH, who provides for his family, continues to do so, no matter how inflated it seems. BM did not have a job while they were married and got a part time job (-20 hours a week) during the divorce. Shortly after the divorce she quit. DH continued all the household bills from the time he left her until the divorce was final (over a year) because his atty told him it would make him look better in court. BULLSHIT, it didn't get him anything. He walked away with the shirt on his back and some of her bills, the house still in his name, and had to pay off her car. Not to mention Joint Custody that still only gets him EOW and 4 weeks in summer. WTF is wrong with the system!! Men get screwed and don't even get to enjoy it.

My ExH who sucked at providing, I paid a babysitter while I worked and he sat on his ass watching TV or hung out with his deadbeat buddies all day. Hasn't changed a bit.

raggedyann1973's picture

$250 per month for 4kids RaeRae...dxxxxmn!!!! That's not right at all!! I never rec'd anything for my bio daughter (18 yrs)..and he's married with other kids that are taken care of...so not cool...I never understood how a man can never want to see his child and never want to payone thin dime for said child...so sad

moezone's picture

Bottom line if i had my little girl.I would'nt need a damn thing from the mother.Me and her would be just fine. Women Do this shit just to get back at men grow up and get over it and move the hell on. Sad

Marie0124's picture

DH pays 1000 in CS and 2000 in alimony. 1/2 is net pay goes to her! She doesn't work, even though the boys are in school now. Makes me sick that she makes more than I do as a teacher and still complains about DH and how he "abandoned" them.