So I started going to therapy about 4 months ago.
Not to sure if this was a great decision or not.
i have always treated my SD's, twin 17 year olds, like my own. They have been in my life for 10 years and have been living with us for the last 4 full time, 100%. DH and I also have a 5 year old boy and 2 year old girl.
Well, I finally admitted to myself that I do love my Bio kids a little bit more. Great to finally say it but the guilt is killing me. Do I love my SD's any less-NO, do I always like them-NO. And that is okay. Just like my other kids.
Here is the thing, the therapy is helping me to stick up for myself and tell the girls i don't care if you like me it is my house and my rules, If you don't like how i am speaking to you-TOO BAD, if you don't like the consequence-TOO BAD, If you don't like the rules-TOO BAD!
Prob is this is just creating more problems. They are being more rude and unpleasant and DH is letting them get away with it.I also told DH that he can be the one in charge of them now because I am getting no respect for all the things i do for them.
I am sticking to my guns as i am finally getting control of my house again, my DS is not having as many tantrums cause he now sees everyone following the same rules and I have to stick up for what is right and best for MY children.
I always called all 4 of them my children but this may be coming to an end......
I was striving to be the perfect step mom-wonder mom-i could do everything and be great at it...well guess what world i don't want to be that person anymore, it is not making me happy. From now on I am just going to be good enough!
And if you don't like it well.....TOO BAD!