Like so many of you on here, I deal with an impossible, irrational, mentally unstable BM. This has made our blended family life quite a challenge for the last seven-plus years to say the least. Thankfully, DH has FINALLY opened his eyes, and TOGETHER, we have worked as a team to solve these challenges head on.

Life isn't always perfect with regard to her, but at least we are now on the same page when it comes to her craziness and THIS, I feel, is more than half the battle! And because of it, our marriage is stronger.

Now, onto the difference. It hit me today in the simplest of ways, as my ex-husband returned my boys from a 6-day vacation in Florida.

In those 10+ years since my divorce, things between me and my ex have never been terrific, but they have never been contentious, either. He married almost immediately after the ink on our divorce papers was dry, but she's a nice enough lady and is great with the boys! There has never been an angry exchange between us- I have been in their home and they have been in mine (although not a lot)!

So today, when the ex dropped the boys off, I went downstairs to welcome them home. To my surprise, both he and his wife were standing in my entryway! She needed to use the bathroom after a long drive from the airport and he needed to discuss some upcoming weekend switches for the boys. I welcomed them in and we figured this all out without any fuss or muss. And on their way they went.

And then I thought...

This woulg NEVER happen with BM and her husband. In fact, HE'S not even allowed in our driveway anymore because of past issues, and SHE would NEVER be welcomed into our home- EVER. Because of the craziness and mental instability throughout the years, DH has to resort to only communicating with her through email or texting, and I have only had a total of FIVE "conversations" with her in seven years (and that was probably too many!).

But today was an example of how it SHOULD be. I don't care for my ex at all- he's quite a crappy father, if you ask me. But I keep things civil for the sake of the kids. And as for his wife- hey, she's nice enough and she's HIS problem, not mine! Beside, like I said before, as long as she's good to my kids, what do I care?!

So while I KNOW why these BMs are horrible (due to mental issues or their own insecurities, or just because they are plain NASTY), I just continue to shake my head, because I know how EASY and pleasant it CAN be!

And that's my little observation for the day