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Try to do something nice....

Newstep's picture

Submitted by Newstep on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 1:48pm

SD has been wanting her nails done for a long time. SO and BM decided that when she was 13 she could get them done. So I figured her BM could take her kinda like a mom and daugther date. Well turns out SD wanted me to take her and I thought it was nice so I told her for her we would go and both get our nails done.

So her bday was last week and we were busy all week so I scheduled it for the next week she was with us. No big deal right??

WRONG it seems that SD and BM have it all figured out. Where she is going to go and how she is going to get them done etc.,etc. The place they picked is a friend of BM's and SD wanted some 3D nail art done. SO told he she would get something simple done no 3-D and no crazy nail art.

So she goes to bed and SO and I talk and I said since they have it all figured out BM can take her and get her nails done. I don't want to go to someplace where the person is BM's friend. He said that was fine he understood. So we told SD and that was the end of it till this morning.

BM texted SO and wanted the money to get SD's nails done :? He said you made all the plans with her so we figured you wanted to take her which means you pay for it. She said no SD said Newstep wanted to take her and now she doesn't want to take her. So now I have to take her so you guys should pay for it!!! Yeah right crazy lady!! I see their plan from beginning now get me to agree to take her so I can pay for it. If I am paying for it we are going to my place and that is is. Uggggg try to do something nice and this happens.

Comments

purpledaisies's picture

Submitted by purpledaisies on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 1:51pm

I wouldn;t take her either! all they wanted was for you to pay for it was all. they were using you period! sorry that must hurt to know that is all you are to your sd.

Newstep's picture

Submitted by Newstep on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 2:15pm

Thanks Purple Smile it does hurt I thought she wanted to go with me because she always liked my nails before I stopped getting them done. Lo that is what we did but SD said I really want to go to XYZ place because its Mom's friend :sick:

I know!!! SO just stopped responding to BM's texts. He called me and said you know what will happen BM will flake out on her then its lose/lose for SD. He said BM is jealous and insecure she will screw with SD just to try to get to you. I said you are right!!! She is crazy :O

I do want to get my nails done so I am keeping the original appointment and getting my nails done Smile

Ommy's picture

Submitted by Ommy on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 3:12pm

Question for you....who is responsible for paying for the touch up in three weeks? Has that been discussed?

I would suggest laying out xy&z chores that she is expected to do with out fuss if she wants daddy to pay for it. For example scrubbing toilets, moping, cleaning windows, cleaning baseboards(my mom did that to me all the time it was her pet peeve). I went through a nail phase and I had to clean all the time to pay for it.

Newstep's picture

Submitted by Newstep on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 3:32pm

Yes SO and I discussed it and she will have to earn the money for the touch ups. It is about 15-20 every month or so. I saw that one coming and told him we really don't need to be paying for her nails to be done every month. That is something she can earn money for and pay for herself. I can see her getting lazy and just letting her nails go instead of stepping up and doing the chores to earn the money for touch ups.

misscinna's picture

Submitted by misscinna on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 3:13pm

These women are petty and ridiculous. Whenever I put braids or little hair-do's in my skids hair or paint their nails at home as soon as they get in the car BM makes them take their hair-do out and when she gets home she takes their nail polish off. She doesn't even repaint them or redo their hair. So they look ratty and homeless with their bumpy hair and discolored fingernails when they get home. FDH says that doing hair and nails is something she thinks is HER thing because she thinks their clothing and appearance is her personal choice only since they are her property and that it is a reminder to her that she isn't in charge of their looks or dress anymore, also she changes it because she doesn't want them to look anything like me. I got sd5 a hair cut and the lady took off the split ends and nothing more. Just trimmed up her bangs and the gnarly ends. She was so proud and showed her mom and her mom told her she hated it (this coming from the woman that permanently dyed sd5's bangs PURPLE the week before kindergarten). I'm like seriously? All that? I do that stuff because they ASK me to and just because BM isn't in the picture doesn't mean that they should go to school looking raggedy every day. C'mon lady! It's about the kids not about your ridiculous insecurities.

I was so proud of sd10 when she told her mom off about getting her hair cut. I told her that 9 years old was plenty old enough to decide her own hairstyle and she was super excited. With help from me and her sister she picked out a super cute bob haircut which really helped her round face. She told BM about it the week before and BM told her she absolutely will not get it cut that way and what right did I have to even touch the hairs on her head or force her to get it cut!?!? sd10 unloaded on her and told her I WANT this haircut, I picked it out and I am getting it! And she did. And her mom had to admit it looked great on her and she was so happy and confident with it. So there BM! HA!

the_stepmonster's picture

Submitted by the_stepmonster on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 3:39pm

I know exactly what you mean. BM took SD5 to get her ears pierced but then ended up just sticking her in these plastic earrings that look like viruses. One day when we were out shopping SD was admiring some cute earrings at Claire's. I made sure they were hypo-allergenic and for sensitive ears and all that and bought her a set of like 20 in puppies, cows, kitties, etc. For about 4 weeks every time SD5 came over she had no earrings. I assumed they fell off in her sleep or while she was playing etc. so I would just put a new pair on her. After about the 4th week in a row when she came over without earrings, I found out her mother was taking them off of her and wouldn't even replace them. Whatever. Not my problem if her holes close up.

PrincessFiona's picture

Submitted by PrincessFiona on Wed, 01/25/2012 - 3:49pm

This very thing is what keeps me from doing anything nice for SD. Well that and she treats me like dirt. Any nice thing I've ever tried to do for her has ended up like this. Her and BM twist it and try to control and manipulate it until I no longer want anything to do with what ever it is.

I just can't see how a parent can be like this. My DD came home just last month from her father's with her nails all done nice. I told her how nice they looked and she said her and her SM went to have manicures. It didn't in the least cause any jealousy in me. I was happy for her and told her so.