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Mystic18's picture

Submitted by Mystic18 on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 10:08am

I know many of you can probably relate to bio bullcrap, right?

So this morning DH was in a meeting with the mental health department to try to expedite services for this terror living in my house.  The representative was on the phone with social security trying to get that ball rolling when it was brought to his attention that bio mom has been collecting money intended for her disabled son for the past 4 months while he's been destroying my house.  

I am so livid.  Thank you for letting me vent.  

Comments

SteppedOut's picture

Submitted by SteppedOut on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 10:35am

Yikes. I can only assume she could get in some kind of trouble for that?

So she filed for disability payments for her son - and obviously was awarded them. Then immediately switched custody to your dh...and "can't afford to pay cs or anything"... Nice. 

Yeah, I would be pissed off if I was you too. 

STaround's picture

Submitted by STaround on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 10:26am

Very sorry.   I doubt you will get money back.  Can they at least freeze payments to her while they straighten out?  

Mystic18's picture

Submitted by Mystic18 on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 10:28am

Yes, he was able to suspend payments to her as of today.  I don't know that I've been this angry in a long ass time.  I'm trying to do meditative breathing at work but the damn Love Shack is on the radio, making it very difficult. lol

SteppedOut's picture

Submitted by SteppedOut on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 10:34am

I don't think I could stop myself from calling to let her know what a piece of $hit she is. I guess you know how she was able to afford to go on vacation now.

So, kudos to your strength.

Mystic18's picture

Submitted by Mystic18 on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 10:43am

Honestly, I'm about one commercial break away from sending both DH and her an email.  When we got the invoice for the computer the kid broke at school, they copied all of us on that email.  I wrote a check for that yesterday but didn't mail it off.  I sent that to DH letting him know I expect her to pay for it and if he wasn't comfortable letting her know that, I would be more than happy to.  F that.  

still learning's picture

Submitted by still learning on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 11:21am

Why are you writing the check to the school?  Shouldn't DH be the one feeling the pain and dealing with the damage HIS son created?  Why are you receiving emails from the school?  How about you wash your hands of the whole thing, take your name/contact info off of any records and turn the responsibility back over to his parents?!  

What a ridiculous situation that you have taken responsiblity for.  How nice of you to take care so that mom and dad don't have to deal with their monster.  

marblefawn's picture

Submitted by marblefawn on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 11:06am

I haven't heard that song in years! Forget meditating. Get up and dance like you're heading to the LOVE SHACK!

TIN ROOF....RUSS-TED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously, though. I haven't heard that song in years!

No, OK, really...seriously...it was four months -- could have been 40. Don't let BM steal more from you than what she already has. You probably can't do anything but stop it and you've done that. Enjoy the thought of her getting pushed off the gravy train and move on!

marblefawn's picture

Submitted by marblefawn on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 11:10am

PS: Ohhhhh, no. Don't tangle with that woman!

Let him deal with her. You need your distance to keep an objective eye on this. Let them duke it out and you keep an eye on the bottom line. Knowing she's making you crazy, wasting your time, will delight and amuse her and that will ramp her up.

Keep your hands clean. You might need to touch something with them later, if you know what I mean.

Mystic18's picture

Submitted by Mystic18 on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 11:16am

Oh absolutely.  Anything that has to do with her turns to shit, so I defintely want to stay out of it.  I've just never been so tempted before to meddle.  Every now and then, someone comes along who brings out the absolute worst in us, but I totally agree it's best to take the high road.  Today, that's just really damn hard.  

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 10:44am

I know venting helps.  And you can only vent here. Where most people agree with you.  But you have to face reality. REALITY is at 14 he is not going to get that much better. This kid will never going to be able to live on his own.  18 yo and him leaving is not reality.   There are a limited number of choices for this kid.  Some type of group home for disabled people. Where he going to end up someday anyway.  You will try to take care of him, not having a life for yourself and your Bio’s.  Or devorice DH and wash your hands of all of it. 

If he already hit his mother, Do you really think he will not hit you ?  Do you want to br 65 and still be taking care of this kid/ adult ?  There a saying here.  YOU can not do more then birth parents.  Your are doing more them Bio mom.  This is unfair to you and your Bio kids.

ProbablyAlreadyInsane's picture

Submitted by ProbablyAlready... on Tue, 10/02/2018 - 11:43am

I think it's enough to piss anyone off. I'm literally applying for food stamps SOLELY to point out to them that BM can't be claiming them legally...