UGHHHHH.

So BD3 has had glasses for the better part of her life. And while they are kind of adorbs it just makes the trials and tribulations of toddler-hood that much more fun. I'm on hold ordering another lens to the tune of $75 and I need to vent about it.

1.) Keeping track of $250 that is pretty much rubberbanded to your child's head is always fun. Especially when they are delicate, easily scratched and your child basically lives in her sandbox and enjoys rough housing, riding the lawn mower and playing hide and seek with them. Oh yeah- and enjoys pulling them as far foreword as she can and then allowing them to snap back in her face-then screams in agony because she's a freakin' child prodigy I swear. Then you get to walk around the grocery store, ducking sideways glances from sanctimommy strangers who are staring while stating "Yes my child gives herself black eyes".

2.) People like to ask if they are real. What do you mean are they real? No my 3 year old wears 1/2 thick bottle cappers lookin like Ralphie because it's a fashion statement. You think I enjoy keeping track of those things? Hell to the no. THEN when they are lost you feel like the shittiest parent on the face of the planet and your lack of responsibility will be the reason why she's going to have Esotropia well into adulthood.

3.) The complete and utter fiery fury you feel when she pops out a lens, hands it to you and YOU lose it because you were at the bank, and she was tantruming because she thinks that the bank is Dunkin' Donuts while the teller has 50 million questions about the transaction that you make on the same day, every single GD month with the same teller, in the same drive through port wearing that same exhausted glazed over "I'm just barely mimicking normal human behavior but really I'm about to lose my shit" smile that has become your Hallmark.

And here they sit on my desk staring at me while I wait, still on hold, to get info on replacement parts because yet again they are missing the right lens, the morning after I had a horrible night mare where I was being chased by a tiny pair of pink mira-flex glasses.

Sorry rant over.