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Poor Parenting V. Bad Seed

MdMom's picture

I know I have been Blogging and posting in forums a lot lately... But I am Just in AWE at some of the things I hear SD say that BM tells her.

BM says that SD is a 'bad seed', but FDH and I don't see it. Sure, like I've said before, SD is a typical 4yo. Who needs to learn how to control her emotions a little better. I guess BM doesn't understand that you have to TEACH children how to act, and how to get a handle on how they show what they're feeling.
For example:
Rather than telling a child that a Policeman will come take them away for crying too loud, or for an extended period of time, why not... hmmm, i don't know, talk calmly about why they are crying and tell them that it's okay to cry, but it doesn't have to be overpoweringly loud.

The above example is actually what SD has told me and FDH.
I just shake my head at BM, and feel saddened that SD has to worry about a cop coming to take her away for crying.

I told SD that Policemen were nice people and they just take grown ups to jail. and that the grown ups have to be Bad people. She just shook her head and said that's not what BM told me!

I think I'm going to call one of my police force friends up to see if they can come meet her, and talk to her about what policemen do.
The LAST thing we want is for SD to be afraid of Policemen because they take kids from their moms.
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Comments

MdMom's picture

I know!! I total flip from the norm. But she has said it to SD, FDH and anyone else who will listen.
I know that SD is not a bad seed, FDH and I have her 50-60% of the time, and when she is home with us she is a very well behaved 4yo, Better then most actually.
I just can't believe that BM says things like this to her.
It's NEVER BM's fault that SD acts the way she does when she is with her.

I agree that some kids ARE just born to be evil/bad, whatever. But I promise you that SD is not one of those kids.