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The attitude talk... how it went.

MdMom's picture

Submitted by MdMom on Thu, 12/12/2013 - 1:51pm

A few days ago I posted on ggeneral discussion forum about SD3's attitude. Here's the link if you didn'tread it and would like to ccatch up... http://www.steptalk.org/node/173153

I talked to FDH about how he handles it vs how I handle it... Let'sjust say iit didn't go over too well. Rather than hearing me out about if we don't nip this in the butt and show SD that its not okay to talk to adults the way she has he made excuses for her... 'It's just a phase.' 'She's only 3.'... Blah blah blah.

Then the conversation switched from how to take care of SD'S attitude to how much I let BD1's short comings slide... It just irritates me because FDH says SD is still a baby, and BD is no longer a baby... The two girls are roughly 16mo apart, so of course I'm going to get a little defensive. If you consider SD to still be a baby, the BD is still a baby too...

After FDH started picking at things I did wrong with the children I stopped listening, and talking... I'm sure its a topic that will come up again, and I will try to be better prepared for his excuses.

Comments

MdMom's picture

Submitted by MdMom on Thu, 12/12/2013 - 2:18pm

Lol, honestly I couldn't tell you. These are FDH's words. I try to explain to him that she is still learning what we expect from her... Its not like she's gonna wake up one day and know what we expect. Its going to take time for her to know that screaming in the store isn't okay, or jumping on the couch is a no no. And he just needs to be patient.

QueenBeau's picture

Submitted by QueenBeau on Thu, 12/12/2013 - 2:03pm

Sounds like your SD gets her attitude from your DH.

I'd let him know no kid in your home is allowed to act like that. If he ain't gonna nip it in the butt, then they will need to have visitation elsewhere.

You'd be surprised on how much kids pick up on. You don't want your BD to start acting like that.

whatwasithinkin's picture

Submitted by whatwasithinkin on Thu, 12/12/2013 - 2:19pm

I call bullshit, but you missed your oppurtunity but because he is a man you will have ample oppurtunity in the future. I handle men in a very specific way because the basis of them all is the same ....simple.

You guys seriously need to learn to parrot. I have been in customer service for 15 years I talk to 80 pissed off people a day. He says:
"so if DD said that to YOU, you would just let her go scotch free?' His reply 'well no, I'd probably wrap her on the butt for talking to me like that."

What he has really said was it is OK for her to TALK to YOU like that but not OK to talk to HIM like that. Why? Because HE is the parent and YOU are the step parent.

And that above statement is what I would have said to him. OK so I am to hard on her by placing her in time out for speaking to me like that, But YOU would wrap her on the ass? So what you are saying is YOU are going to allow YOUR, let's not forget she is YOUR child talk to me like that but you are willing to wrap her ass and send a message that it is not OK to talk TO YOU like that. I see. So I'll tll you what honey. I dont do things for people that feel it is ok to talk to me like that and even more I dont do things for people who claim to love me and married me yet allow people they have control over to talk to me like that. So YOUR poor baby girl, yep she is all yours. I wont say a word, and let's see how you handle it and how you ALLOW her to treat me. Along with not saying a word I will not bath her, do her laundry, wipe her nose or butt when she need help, read her books. NOPE that is her Daddy's job and since you've made it clear I am not her parent have at it.

turn flipping hair over shoulder, end of discussion