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Charging room n board or not..

Manda's picture

I was raised that after 18 you pay room and board... FH and I don't agree on that rule... Apperantly fh and I have different views on the subject because I feel if a child moves out at an adult age then they should provide for themself. If anyone let's their child in the home without any responsibilty the only thing they're going to do is to take advantage of the freedom.

Comments

bellydancer's picture

No one lives for free. Charging some moderate amount for room and board teaches young adult children that "no one lives for free." You may have to set some new rules for your adult child. Once they pay, they feel entitled to come and go as they please. I had the most trouble with this when my younger some came home the summer after his freshman year at college. This wasn't about paying board, it was about him coming and going at all hours of the day and night. Or, he'd disappear for a couple of days and crash at a friend's house without telling us. My rule was this--if you are going to be later than 2AM or if you arent' coming home, call my work number and leave me a voice message. That way if I wake up in the middle of the night and you arent' home, I can check my voice mail, find a message from you and know that you are safe. That worked...sometimes. Other times we fought about it. Good luck.

now4teens's picture

I have a 19-yr-old mentally disabled son (Down Syndrome).

When he turned 18-yrs-old and was eligible for Social Security Disability benefits (because he would never be "gainfully employed") he began to get his piddance of a monthly check- and I'm not kidding, this thing is next to NOTHING.

But in order for him to get even THAT small amount, I had to agree, under oath, that I would charge my MENTALLY CHALLENGED SON monthly rent (around $200/month) and claim it on my taxes each year!

And I also had to agree, under oath, that if any future adult children (over 18) came to live with with us after college, we would charge them AT LEAST that same amount of rent per month.

So if the government has no problems with making parents of handicapped children pay them monthly rent to live with them, then I see NO REASON on God's green earth why any able-bodied "normal" child can't be expected to do the same!

"Of course things worked out nicely for Carol Brady...she had a live-in maid and Mike's first wife was DEAD!"

caya506's picture

I lived at home with my parents until I was almost 21, while going to school and working. They never charged me any kind of rent. But since I was 15 years old I had a job and paid for just about everything of mine on my own, cell phone, car, gas, ins. etc. with the exception of food. The only thing they asked of me was to keep my stuff picked up and help out with the dishes and mowing the lawn. I didn't have a ton of responsibility, but my parents already new that I was responsible and what the value of a dollar was. Not everyone is going to take advantage of the freedom, if you're kid is already lazy and irresponsible then yes they will certainly take advantage and should assume responsibility, ie paying rent, but if you have a kid that understands these kinds of things and they're employed or in school, taking care of their other bills then no I don't think you should charge them room and board.

justbdais's picture

I also lived at home until I was 21 and my parents never charged me rent. The rule in their house is once you graduate High school you can either move out, stay at home and go to college, or you could stay at home but you had to get a job. Now if you were going to school my parents didn't charge rent. As I was in college my parents did not make me pay rent. My youngest sister did not go to college and my parents make her pay rent and she has to provide her own food.