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SD5 and her non-graduation - Update

MamaBecky's picture

http://www.steptalk.org/node/45616

So I made the decission not to go...and because I didnt go DH didnt either. BM went just so that SD5 would have someone in the audience for her. She didnt get a good seat and she didnt take any pictures. SD5 got an award for "best hugger" in class and then they sang a couple of songs. Cute but who cares since shes not graduating and the teacher told both BM and I during Spring Conferences that they had determined that retention was best for SD5 and BM & I agreed that having her repeat would be best for her. BM and I both agreed we were not going to make a huge deal about it (hence no pictures) and that next year when she truly does graduate we would do all of the hoopla.

BM went up to teachers after the ceremony and simply asked when she would obtain information moving forward for SD5's repeating of kindergarten. Teacher looked at BM and said "Oh yeah, we talked about that just yesterday and decided we are going to pass her to first grade. We will have a conference with you guys (all 4 parents) at the beginning of the year and asses her and see if she will need additional help then". BM was floored and of course called me right away. She was upset because she hadnt taken pictures and mostly because my DH and I didnt make it. She knew how upset I would be. I will say I dont know that I have ever been so angry. So, this is what it feels like to be a mom huh? Wow I was livid. Needless to say she has a field trip tomorrow which I will be attending...and her last day of school is on Wednesday...it will also be track and field day...and I will be attending. Once the final bell rings on the last day of school I will be having an interesting discussion with her teacher. }:)

Comments

uncommon's picture

I am so angry for ALL of you right now. It is totally unacceptable that the school didn't notify you ahead of time. I'm pretty level-headed but I would have had to scream at someone.

Auteur's picture

Same ol' same ol' Dad is only a wallet and not a parent type crap.

The school district admins told GG that his opinion to hold VD back in the 4th grade as she was failing big time doesn't count because he is NOT the CUSTODIAL PARENT.

Guess what? VD has been socially promoted up to the sixth grade now and she is sprinting to a 61 average in all four core subjects. Can hardly wait to see her PASS this grade and go on to 7th grade in September with those grades. Nice work BM and stupid school district!! Gotta love NYS where biodads have ZERO rights.

Jsmom's picture

You can force them to hold her back if you think it is in her best interest. That is rotten that they did that...

Auteur's picture

Not in NYS with the MAYOR of Podunk, NY, the Behemoth at the helm. It's her hometown; all the school officials are her contemporaries and BFFs so they do as they please and say "how high" when the Behemoth says: "JUMP!"

Any day now the Behemoth will be marching in and demanding that they pass VD up to the 7th grade despite getting a 61 average in her core subjects that are "specially designed" for "learning disabled" children.

Problem is VD is NOT learning disabled. She's extremely clever; refuses to do the work as she's been taught since the day she popped out of the BM's hoo hoo that she doesn't have to do anything distasteful or anything that requires effort.

Auteur's picture

I'm sure she'll be reproducing by age 16 at the lastest. After all there IS some FUN involved in conception!!

And no doubt she has her mother's wide child bearing hips, so it won't be that much of a problem to pop them out like her mother, the Breeder Behemoth.

MamaBecky's picture

I am livid with the school. No she does not know all of her site words, she does well with letters, sounds and reading when she wants to, math she struggles with but we have seen improvement.

Our fear was that if she didnt repeat 1st grade was going to be even worse then kindergarten. She does have some academic struggles but those arent nearly as much of a concern as her behavioral struggles. She has good days and bad days but when she has bad they are bad. She suffers from entitlement that so many kids these days suffer from....and she can be very mouthy, argumentative, refuses to participate, etc. She gets in trouble alot.

We will all be working with her alot over the summer and we are all hoping for a better year.

We do find some of the problem originating with her teachers as well. Next year with a new teacher we are hopeful that it will also make a difference.

Time will tell.

christag's picture

It's horrible you weren't told that SD was actually graduating from kindergarten. What kind of teacher makes that kind of decision and doesn't tell all the parties involved?

If they're willing to pass you stepdaughter to 1st grade, it might be better than keeping her back. I truly regret redshirting my son in kindergarten. He has ADHD and was a real handful and only academically average, so I held him back in kindergarten despite the fact he had an early birthday. It helped considerably that he was always the oldest in his class. I didn't think about what that would mean in high school. When he was little, I was so sensitive to what he didn't know and how much more advanced the other kids in his class seemed. Now, I'm dealing with an 18 year old who has another year of high school and doesn't want to go!