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Does BM want FH to be a dead beat?

livizzle's picture

Submitted by livizzle on Fri, 12/17/2010 - 2:00pm

I’m about to leave to go to skids’ Christmas party at their school. No FH. No BM. It’s just me, and I’ll admit that I’m nervous. BM never tells us about events at skids’ school until they are right smack dab in the middle of it or until afterwards, so we haven’t been able to attend anything this year. BM is buddy-buddy with the parents, and I guess I’m just scared that I’m going to walk in and someone is going to go, “oh, your FH is the deadbeat!” because BM likes to tell everyone about everything. In reality, I know that that will never happen. But still.

Part of me thinks that BM wishes FH would be a deadbeat and have nothing to do with his kids. In fact, I KNOW that’s what she wants. If she could have the CS too, well, that would be victory for her. She acted flabbergasted when FH told her that he had to work and couldn’t go to their school today. He informed her that I was going and she was still like, “WHY CAN’T YOU GO?!” Ok, mother of the year, YOU leave your “office party” early and go to their school. Idiot.

Comments

Jojo007's picture

Submitted by Jojo007 on Fri, 12/17/2010 - 3:50pm

That is our situation!!! It makes me so mad. She doesn't work so shes at everything. Gets all busy buddy with the teachers and coaches and parents who glare at dh like he's the worst father in the world. He "abandoned" them. Hmmmm, your alimony, cs, not having to work, us getting the kids eow and 2 nights during the week is abandonment. Hmmm. She was so mean to him and now plays this act of how perfect and nice she is. Its sickening

caregiver1127's picture

Submitted by caregiver1127 on Fri, 12/17/2010 - 4:54pm

I think most of these BM's tell so many lies and have lied for so long that their lies become reality for them. In our case our BM cheated on my DH and now 7 1/2 years later it was all my DH's fault and also we found out this summer from SS17 that our BM had to pull herself up from nothing after the divorce because my DH left her penniless - really $103,000.00 is penniless - when we showed SS the divorce degree I swear you have never seen such bug eyes. I hate our BM!!!!

Tx mommy of 3's picture

Submitted by Tx mommy of 3 on Fri, 12/17/2010 - 5:36pm

Yep. Our bm wants him to have nothing to do with ss but wants all his money! Ummm...whatever. She was mad when they went to mediation (only because she requested MORE cs!) and dh got more time with ss. I don't enjoy ss visits but sheesh!

StepDeux's picture

Submitted by StepDeux on Fri, 12/17/2010 - 6:16pm

Our BM does. She feels like SO should just pay CS and have no say in his SD's life unless, of course, it's convenient for BM. BM goes around badmouthing him to EVERYONE she can and talks about how awful he is to her. She forgets to mention that the ONLY reason the ever have any problems is because she doesn't let him see his kid!

I wouldn't worry about people thinking your FH is a deadbeat. Instead, if people talk to you, maybe they will realize that you are awesome and not put so much weight onto what BM says, you know? And, even if they do, who cares? It's not like the other school parents are your friends.

Man, some BMs really are completely messed up!