So I hate my husbands biological father. My MIL divorced him when my DH was 3 or 4 because he was abusive, a drug addict, and serially unfaithful. He even gave my MIL an STD! From then on until my DH was about 17, his dad was in and out of prison because of drugs and for abusing women. I think he spent two years in prison once because of Felony Assault-DV.

My DH says that one of his first memories is after his mom and dad had divorced he was spending the night at his dad's house. He was sleeping in the living room and woke up to see his dad rip the phone out of the wall, go to the back bedroom, where whatever woman he was seeing at the time was. He could hear her crying. When his dad ripped the phone out of the wall, he gave my DH this evil little smirk. I'm sure you can imagine as well as I can what he did with that phone.

My FIL doesn't do Meth anymore, but he does drink excessively and smokes pot excessively. He has become this "I believe in God now, so therefore not only am I better than you I am always right and you be damned" kind of person. He is mean, tempermental, and completely self-absorbed. He says he'll "help" you, making it seem like it is genuine help, but after the fact he wants everything under the sun from you in return. If any of you know anything about Psychology or have happened to read the DSM-IV...he is a CLASSIC Anti-Social Personality. Like, as you read it, it is my FIL. He fits all the symptoms, diagnostic criteria, everything. It even says that those with Anti-Social Personality disorder stop having as much trouble with the law in their late 30's early 40's due to less drug abuse. This is him!

He is just not a good person and he honestly scares me. I saw him beat the crap out of his socalled best friend just because this man was poking a little fun at him. Seriously! That's it!

My husband gave FIL our new home number yesterday. Today, FIL showed up unannounced to my house and DH wants us to go over there for dinner tonight. I don't know what to do. I do not want to be around this man AT ALL. But can I do that? It is my DH's father after all. What would you suggest are some ground rules? His dad lives really close to us, so him showing up unannounced is not surprising in the least. There was a blowout a couple months ago and FIL hasn't been over since. But historically, he has stopped over unannounced all the freaking time. I hate it. Ugh, I just don't know what to do.