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Hey guess what this is why you should have a custody agreement SO!

Lalena75's picture

SO's weekend with the kids (by verbal agreement, nothing legal) SO got a nasty text he'd get the kids sometime xmas day, he replied it was his weekend she could have the 9am-2pm xmas eve and 2pm-8pm xmas day. She replied "you lost your right to tell me what I will do, I'll LET you have the kids sometimes sunday you can keep them till monday." HIM "I'll see the kids friday night at 6pm for my visitation" HER "Nope, bye"
Guess what didn't suprise me? She didn't bring the kids last night. Today he text her "I'll see the kids at 2pm." Nothing back, 2:15 HIM "where are my kids?" HER "I'm playing with them" Him "I want my kids now!" HER "@#$% U, bye" HIM "You're so worried about how you're seen as a mom and this is a prime example of what you really are with holding our kids right to spend time with their dad." HER "when you stop making it about U, then we'll see, so no CS again this week?" (no CS order either) HIM "My kids deserve their dad for Christmas this is about THEIR best interest!"
Guess what he told them on the phone Santa would bring presents here too, he told them he'd see them Friday. His last message to her "The kids WILL know it was YOU that kept them from me!"
We are opening presents in the morning, then to my parents, who knows if or when she will show. If it was court ordered we could do something but nope he thought they could just adjust as they go and work it out between them, hahahaha yeah nope, I knew she was going to do this I knew it at Thanksgiving when she wouldn't let him have the kids at all that day. I told him "you have a few options, call the cops who won't do anything because there is no court order, get a lawyer and get this crap legal, or not return the kids when he gets them next and when she calls the cops they will likely harass HIM, but still can't DO anything. I'm mad for him, but I'm also just kinda eh about it as it's his own fault. I do really want to be the B$#@h she's been calling me and if/when she shows tomorrow, walk out to get the kids with him so she can listen to them squeel with happiness to see me and their dad, and see them hug me and jump into my arms, and I'll smile as I wish her a Merry Christmas. Then watch her show her ass, cause she will, and I will laugh my ass off at her for it go inside let them open presents and hopefully if she shows up before my kids go to their dads (I'm letting him have them overnight on my night, my weekend cause he's their dad and it's Christmas and they and he should get to have time together)my son will still get to see and feel what it's like to play Santa.
I saw this coming, I'm not suprised, and it won't ruin Christmas anyway.

Comments

attempting_to_maintain_composure's picture

UGH. I am in the same situation with my SO and his GUBM. No court ordered custody and visitation agreement. Nothing even in writing. Simply a verbal agreement between two idiots. One who means well and wants what is best for SD12 and one who is all about the CS and getting every red cent she can out of SO and is all about punishing him for their failed relationship while not giving a hoot about SD's relationship with him. Much like you and your SO, it is kind of up in the air about if we will get SD12 or not, even when we lived much closer to GUBM. GUBM & SO will make arrangements (OK who am I kidding? SO will badger GUBM into making arrangements with him - like, he'll seriously have to text her ten times before getting one response to a request, and, of course, her response usually involves some question about money), but, until the day of, we never know if it is going to happen because we have no way to enforce it with her, no court to file a complaint in if she reneges on anything, no power at all.

And, much like you, when that ish goes down, I recognize that they're both at fault. Because they're the idiots who decided a verbal agreement would be best. SO has known how I feel about their "agreements" because I don't hide that from him, I tell him all the time that he is a Grade A Moron for ever deciding that it was in everyone's best interest to be civil about the 'separation' between GUBM and himself without at least writing something up between the two of them. The only thing that makes it better right now, until he can get his behind to a lawyer (if he ever decides to, that is), is when he says "You're right, AtMC, I've royally screwed myself on this one".