All I can say is after the trust is broken you will never get it back. If you are blaming yourself you need to stop. He is responsible for what he has done so let him deal with the consequences. I personally would not want to be married to someone so dumb that they are using a family cell phone to call women knowing that eventually you would find it.
I had that look on my face for a long time.

...but my 5yo daughter told me the other day that I have a big butt. Sometimes they see things (and say things!) we don't want to see or can't admit. And sometimes they are right. Out of the mouths of babes...! Of course, you're mad. You're probably spitting nails. It's okay to be mad. Just tell your little one that yes, you are mad, but you are not mad at him/her.

I'm sorry you're going through this. I've been in this boat, too, and it's not fun. My DH and I had a long talk about what constitutes infidelity before we were married, because we'd both been cheated on by our previous spouses. We share the opinion that you don't necessarily have to exchange bodily fluids with someone else to cheat. Sometimes I think an emotional affair is far more difficult to overcome than a one night stand. I believe it's better to work on the connection with your spouse than to seek one with someone outside your marriage.

But others disagree. Others think it's okay to flirt with, talk to and form a close platonic relationship with someone of the opposite sex as long as you don't actually have sex. Some people think that if you're secure in your relationship and/or are not the jealous type, then you shouldn't care if your spouse has a close friendship with a member of the opposite sex. Some people even believe healthy, platonic relationships with others outside the marriage can actually enrich the marriage. I'm not one who thinks like that, but there are those who would make that argument. You seem to believe like me, that whether he actually had sex with these women or not, it's still a form of cheating. But maybe your husband is of the other mindset, the one that believes he can form platonic friendships with other women without dishonoring his marriage vows to you. You could give him the benefit of the doubt, because maybe he really is that ignorant of your expectations and your definition of fidelity. The argument could be made that if he were trying to hide something, he wouldn't have used a cell phone to call these women when you have access to the records. He could have easily, and inexpensively, gotten a Go phone or TracFone or something like that at the corner store for twenty bucks and kept it all hidden from you. I also strongly believe that if you have nothing to hide, then you have nothing to fear. If he wasn't hiding it, then maybe his big, dumb, stupid self didn't think of it as anything worth hiding.

I've given you two different set of beliefs ponder. First, that it's cheating. Second, that he may not think of what he's doing as cheating. You know your husband better than any of us. You have to listen to your inner voice, evaluate the evidence based on what you know of your husband and decide if a trust issue truly exists. You have to not blame yourself, because (1) no one is perfect and (2) imperfection is not an excuse for or cause of cheating. Get thee to a marriage counselor post haste. Not necessarily to save your marriage, but to see first if you want to try to save your marriage, to see next if you can save your marriage and to finally help you forge the path into the next phase of your life. A door has definitely closed, but there are others opening. The next step is to choose which door you want to walk through and whether or not you want to walk through it alone.

♥ Georgia ♥

"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)

It's all about trust now. That's the answer to what you need to do next. Can/do you think you'll be able to trust him again? The fact that he was juggling 2 women would make me, personaly, run the other way, and not look back....but that's just me. His straying is not because you did something wrong, it's because of him...that's why he needed the attention of 2 other women, there is something in him that can't be filled. HIS PROBLEM! I'm so sorry for this to be happening, and I know it's hard to try to put on the happy face for the little one, just let baby know that sometimes mommy's have bad days too, w/ my kids, I was "tired" all the time......now they say, at the bright ages of 10, & 13...wow mom, we are so glad to see you awake!!!! :)~ " I started out clean, now, I'm jaded"~ Rob Thomas, Matchbox 20

a cheater that didn't blame it on someone. Lack of character (his)is to blame, not you. I am so sorry he has hurt you this way.