So my SS6 has a hard time controlling his rage. He is getting better, at 4 he used to just melt down, tantrum and swing his fists, break stuff, scream & cry, basically until he passed out. He still gets like out-of-control angry, but no longer just wrecks everything nearby, and the last time we had him he didn't have any meltdowns AT ALL, which was awesome. We know some triggers are hungry/tired situations, and I think he is really growing up, so partially he is just learning control. The hard part is that hisBM claims he has these really violent freak outs with her, and she tries to blame it on us! She told us he "tried to stab her" and threatens to kill her and says he wishes he were dead. This makes my DH just beside himself with grief and guilt, but i have a hard time believing the BM. She is a known liar. She will twist and exaggerate ANYTHING to her own ends. She is trying to convince a psychiatrist that SS can't "handle the disruption" of seeing his dad. Now SS has had meltdowns with us in the past, but NEVER to the degree BM claims he has them. He has "threatened" to bite me, a long time ago, but even then, it was like "IMMA BITE YOU!" And he slowly leans forward with his mouth open and teeth bared, but he doesn't mean it, he is sort of just posturing. I said, "sweetie, nobody bites," and he closed his mouth and pouted hardcore, but he has never been serious. Now BM pulls this shit every time we get the kids, she draws a correlation every freaking time. This time, within 48 hours of dropping the skids off, BM interrogated them both, yelled at them for several things, punished them both for one of them getting in minor trouble at school (not listening during lesson) she took away tv privileges for both for a whole week. She threatened not to let them speak to their dad, and not to let me or DH speak to them in earshot of the skids. But it is TOTALLY OUR FAULT that the younger one had a meltdown because 48 hours before that we had "disrupted" his routine with a very pleasant weekend of fun and family.

Some days i just tell myself that when they get to be 12 we will go back to court and the skids will come live with us, and I hope to freaking GOD we will be able to help them through all the complete shit she is doing to them. I hope they are strong enough to overcome the damage she is doing.