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Jv1265287's picture

Hello everyone!

I honestly don't even know where to start. I find myself on this page because I am struggling to be a stepmom.  I don't have any children of my own, but I do have a 6 year old step kid. Needless to say he absolutely drives me crazy and sometimes I feel like I can't handle another minute of being around him. I cring at the thought of him coming to our home. He destroys everything and doesn't listen to me. Sometimes I find myself hiding in my own home just to get away from him. I feel pathetic that a child can make me feel so horrible, and I feel like a bad human for not wanting to take care of him. I love my husband and I thought that I could handle it because of my love for him... But as soon as his kid shows up I want to run away and leave everything behind. 

Comments

lieutenant_dad's picture

What does your DH do to keep his kid in line and make your home peaceful for you?

Nine times out of ten, the problem isn't the SK. They are just the symptom of our partners' inability to parent.

Jv1265287's picture

He tries to set boundaries but he expects me to be a mom in every term. If I don't feed the kid, my husband doesn't bother to feed him. It is frustrating that I am expected to do everything. 

Harry's picture

Is only one BM accident away,  or one boy toy away.  
Is this how you want to live your life ?

Jv1265287's picture

No, this is not how I want to live my life. I feel responsible because I knew he was a dad when I married him. I got more than what I bargained for. 

thinkthrice's picture

not too late to reverse course

SteppedOut's picture

You knew he was a dad, yes. But is he acting like a dad? Sounds like he's just acting like you should take over HIS RESPONSIBILITY. 

tog redux's picture

Not your job to be his parent, you didn't bring him into this world - that's DH's job. I never did any parenting, it's not mandatory when you marry a man with a kid. 
 

You need to make some changes. 

Jv1265287's picture

I think I have a hard time setting boundaries. Mostly because I don't know where to draw the line. I feel pressured from every angle to act like him mom.