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Just confused's picture

Submitted by Just confused on Sat, 12/08/2018 - 7:50am

My DHs daughter only texts or calls when she wants money or a ride. We live about 30-45 minutes away from my SD who is 13. DH will text her every day when he wakes up around 2pm (he works 3rd shift). He’ll ask how her day was and it will take her 2+ hours to text him back with 1 word responses like “good” , “fine” , “idk” etc. But as soon as she needs money or a ride she replies almost instantly. I know his obligation is to take care of her, but this is getting ridiculous. 

If you read my 2 past blogs, you’ll get more of the backstory. I have been keeping my opinions to myself because it is not my place. But this girl was bragging about getting detentions and almost getting caught with marijuana in school. She’s in detention at least once a week. She went to a mental facility about 3-4 weeks ago for cutting herself, but only stayed 4 days. She would put on social media that she was cutting. I personally believe it was all for the attention. Sadly, she is becoming the spitting image of her mother more each day.

I just don’t want my DH to be used, I don’t know if I should say something or wait to see how this goes. 

Comments

tog redux's picture

Submitted by tog redux on Sat, 12/08/2018 - 10:07am

If he pays Child Support, then he's not obligated to give her money whenever she calls.  And frankly, if he wants to help her, paying child support is better than giving a 13-year-old spending money. I can see he might feel guilt about the whole situation, but enabling her to use him for money won't help.

Just confused's picture

Submitted by Just confused on Sat, 12/08/2018 - 9:20pm

Thank you both for your responses. That is a major issue I’m having is with her using him and not really wanting any involvement in his life. If she would try to carry a conversation with him or reply back a little faster, the occasional question for money wouldn’t be an issue, but that’s the only time she gets in touch with him or holds a conversation. I guess her grandmother is getting her on some medication to help with depression and anxiety along with therapy. I just don’t want my DH to self destruct because of all the stress.