The drama never ends
Well my husband finally got it touch with SD last night just to say hi. He has been calling her and either BM's cell is turned off or BM says she isn't there and will give her the message and of course she never returns his calls. SD was very short with him and didn't act like she wanted to come to our house. Usually when he calls a couple of days before our weekend she is thrilled and can't wait. About an hour later BM called and said that SD didn't want to come b/c she thought that Daddy was mad at her. Why would she think that he is mad at her? BM is probably filling her head with all kinds of BS. She is 8 years old and probably forgot about the whole situation the next day. (see original post: Can't stand BM!!) BM said that she was going to leave it up to SD if she wanted to come or not. Surprisingly DH told her no, she doesn't have a choice.(she's the child, not the adult) It was his weekend and he was picking her up whether she wanted to come or not. He only gets to see her EOW and BM tries to alienate her from us as much as possible. Then SD calls crying. DH told her that he wasn't mad at her. Nothing about me not being mad at her, just him. She probably thinks I hate her b/c she ratted me out. I don't know why he never asked her why she thought he might have been mad at her? Don't you think that would have been a question you would have asked??? She probably doesn't want to come b/c she knows that when she gets home BM is going to interrogate her about everything that was said and done all weekend and how I was treating her. After he hung up with SD he demanded that I tell her sorry for saying that about her Mom in front of her. WHAT!!!! First of all I'm not sorry for saying that about BM, just the fact that SD heard it. He didn't ask me to tell her sorry, he told me I had to. I told him if he is demanding apologies then BM needs to say sorry for talking shit about me and making fun of SD's message on MY machine wheather she meant for anyone to hear it or not. DH blew up and said that he can't do this anymore. I haven't spoke to him at all since last night. I need help. What would you do? BM is always trying to start shit between DH and I. I don't know why he doesn't see this.
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I am to this site and so I
I am to this site and so I don't know what happened with you and your sd. I know its hard to bite your tongue sometimes but we have to do it in some cases. My husband use to constantly talk poorly of his ex and I felt it wasn't necesary in front of the kids. If he and I want to rant and rave while we are alone then so be it. Which we do often. Or if the child confronts you personally and is mature enough to discuss issues that they may not like to hear. Go for it! I have learned it does more harm than good to really express what your thoughts are especially when it pertains to the BM or BF. What I do know is that your husband should not demand you to apologize. He's going about that the wrong way. He could have suggested it to you but again leave it up to what you feel is confortable for you. Never the less talk with your sd and reassure her your not mad at her if that was the case. Like i said i dont know all that went on.
I Try No To Speak Badly About BM
However she lies so much to the children I find myself having to explain to skids the real deal. I have split opinion on this. On one hand yes you should not talk badly about BM in front of the kids. On the other hand this is my home and the last time I checked we had a constitutional right to freedom of speech. No one tells me what to say and what not to say in my own home. If Skids overhears something I said oh well. I will NOT be forced to apologize for my own opinion.
What Does He Think Your
his child! He demanded, oh no I would have drilled him a new one. Maybe the truth hurt about the mother, oh well maybe it will be a good thing if she never comes over and you'd be rid of both pains.
He's either going to learn his wife comes first, or he'll end up divorced which will be costly and pay both women support. Stand your ground but in the end he'll either see the error of his ways or not. Right now if the daughter doesn't come over, just be happy!!
still drama..
Just an update on my weekend. I didn't talk to DH until Saturday night. He obviously likes to avoid any conflict instead of dealing with the problem. He spent the night at his cousin's house Friday and text me at 2:30am to let me know he was there and not to worry, that he loved me and wished I was there. RIGHT! Of course like most people I was asleep and didn't get the message. The baby woke up at 4am and when I realize that he never came home I just happened to look at my phone and saw the message. That's not really an issue b/c I figured he wanted to keep SD away from me as much of the weekend as possible. I had an eye appt for her at 11am Saturday so I knew they would be home for that. He didn't even get her. I swear DH needs to grow a new pair. He tries to be tough and stand his ground and always ends up doing what BM wants. He said that he decided not to get her b/c she really didn't want to come and he didn't want to make her. (which means that she probably had a birthday she wanted to go to for one of her 100 cousins) Give me a break. He needs to start acting like an adult! So we will get her for the next 2 weekends. I don't know why he thinks she will want to come next weekend. I could care less if I never see that brat again!!!