Need advice on Step Issues now: thanks for the support everyone :)
Trying not to focus too much on my mother but we do actually have a sort of BM issue that I could use some advice on.
And as a reminder, I do NOT agree with if SO is working during part of his parenting time, SD should be with BM because she would just be in daycare during that time anyway.
So if that is your opinion please do not comment because I do not agree.
So FMIL is trying to sell the bar that SO has worked at for almost 9 years. Last summer, SO had left the bar and went to work for a cable company but then he left and went back to the bar because BM was not allowing him to see SD AT ALL because she didn't "like his work schedule".
Well, this company is hiring again and SO really wants to go back, it pays better, its a typical 9-5 so FIRST SHIFT! And he can finally get out of the bar!
My question is, what are the odds of BM taking SD away again?
Right now, we have her every 4 days for 2 days at a time. BM always complains because SO is working nights right now and he is at work while SD is in bed. So I am the one here with her while shes sleeping.
She keeps threatening to take SO to court to lower his time again because of this (which is ridiculous).
We have been documenting how much time we have with her and in reality it is more like we have her 80 percent of the time and during her time, she doesn't even watch her. SO has her practically every day again because he has been taking her all day while BM is at work so that they don't have to pay as much for daycare.
Would SO getting a first shift job make a judge take away his time that he already has? Because if he gets this job and BM takes him to court to take away his time, we are going to counterfile for 50/50.
And no, this isn't really up for discussion that if SO is at work why would he want more time with SD? Because parents work. This is a fact. And if he went for 50/50 then he would have more time with her. At least he would be able to get up with her every morning, and tuck her into bed every night. And I work from home, I would watch her during the day, cutting back on daycare costs. She is in daycare for up to 12 hours on BM's day so her whole logic is absolute bullshit.
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Personally I would have all
Personally I would have all the paperwork ready to file for 50/50 custody the day you tell her that his schedule is you.g to change. Have all the documentation ready that you have her so much now, to knock down any argument from bm. If she tries to pull anything, take her right to court and you can prove that she's being vindictive and trying to use visitation as leverage.
Let her file so you can
Let her file so you can counter.
How old is your SD? My SO has
How old is your SD?
My SO has 50% custody and he works full time. 9-6 monday through friday. when we have them, SO drops ss4 and ss5 off at preschool/day care on his way to work and then picks them up on his way home. The court knows that he works during part of his cutodial time with the boys. CO said that SO has to provide for child care while he's at work, meaning he pays for daycare/preschool.
This is a tough economy and you take what you get when it comes to job. I highly doubt that a judge would reduce your SO's time with his child, because he is working during the day to provide for that child. A lot of parents out there work full time, therefore only see their children a few hours a day during the week.
She will be 3 in November.
She will be 3 in November.
Let her file. If this is
Let her file. If this is best, he should take the job. They aren't that easy to come by right now.
It also sounds like BM is
It also sounds like BM is complaining for the sake of complaining or maybe she has nothing better to do. She was unhappy when your SO works at night and spends the day with his daughter. And now she'll be unhappy because he will work during the day and will be home at night?
He should take the job. Let
He should take the job. Let her take him to court. Chances are a judge will see through it...