I know I haven't posted in a while but I have been reading and keeping up on things. My life has sort of overwhelmed me.

I had my last session with our counselor about a month ago, (our insurance will not pay for any more until next year) and along with some working out of things she recommended I see my physician as she felt I was "situationally clinically depressed". I needed to anyway so that gave me the push to do my whole checkup etc.

The last of the court proceedings with my exH and crazy BM are over (or appear to be). ExH got his CS reduced due to his loss of his professional job so he got what he wanted, while custody not changing. He seems satisfied and that's fine with me. BM got hers increased due to obtaining employment, even though it's not FT and now has to pay $51 more per month, which resulted in her sobbing in the court room, but whatever, it appears it's all done now.

My DH's sister (my SIL) passed away this past weekend after a long fight with cancer. She was only 49 and left behind 2 young sons. Heartbreaking. The services were yesterday. It's been a long week already.

My father's health continues to decline, and he called to have me come out and see him over the weekend, to say his "goodbye" I guess...things he wanted me to know before he passes. That was difficult, as I'm a daddy's girl and its awful to watch my mother go through this as well trying to take care of him and make him comfortable.

I went to the Dr and had a full physical. I was prescribed some anti depressants, Xanax to help me sleep at night, and an antibiotic for a bacterial infection. I had a mammogram (first one) which came back normal, however I also had an ultrasound for abnormal bleeding which came back showing a complex cyst on my left ovary that measures 6x5x4 cms and I was referred to the GYN specialist, still waiting on that call for an appt.

The plus side? Well with CS lowered for my exH he seems to be content with how things are and has been quiet and actually even not utilizing his visitation time (further proving the EOW was purely for lowered CS). Unfortunately BM is just a psycho and crazy as ever, continuously harassing us, even yesterday as we were traveling home after burying sweet SIL. The death of SIL also has brought out the codependent issues with MIL, and she is playing the mourning victim mother role quite well, four calls to my DH since yesterday at 6:00 pm. I know she's grieving, but she isn't giving my DH the time and space he needs to mourn his sister either. She's already laying guilt trips on him about him being the only one she has left, etc etc.

I'm just trying to work through all the stress I feel, the crushing in on myself and continuing to work and complete all the daily tasks I have to. I've been checking in. I have a million things I'd like to ask for help/advice on but I just don't have it in me at the moment, but I'll post soon.

Just wanted to let you all know I'm still around and thinking of you all.