As the holiday....nothing brings out the narcissist rage like a holiday.

Memorial day (here in the states)...I told my two kids we were having crab boil for Memorial Day.  They were welcome to come but to let me know so I could buy the right amount of crab legs.  They both said they were coming.  Cool..

Apparently their plan was to spend the morning with the Village Idiot..aka my ex their dad..and then the evening with me and DH.  However, DS ended up having to work in the morning.  Ok...so DD called the VI and said..hey do you want to take a hike together this morning, etc.  The VI responded well what about DS.  DD informed the VI that DS had to work so it would be just her.  VI came back with ...well we will just wait for DS.  DD...was like uh no...we are going to mom's this evening, so I thought I would come this morning.  The VI responded well I would rather go with both of you.  This PISSED DD off as the VI made her feel like she wasn't good enough and they had to have DS with them.  DD's response was...well ok then..I will just not come over.

Oh lordy..queue up the gaslighting and drama.

According to DD...Vi went all victim mode on her. 

You never come over to see me (they were just there on Saturday).  Everyone is family but MEEEEE.....  You don't care about MEEEE....  I'm all ALONE on a holiday. and it went on and on.

DD just said..nope I'm not coming over and I will see you next week and with that she HUNG UP ON HIM.  The VI continued to text her but she hung tight and didn't respond.

DS did end up going over there after work for a bit...and by the time he got to my house he was pissy since the VI laid into him for DD and the fact he was coming over here for dinner.  

When DD got to my house she told me about the VI and the fact that she just doesn't want to deal with the VI's drama.  She is like..THIS IS WHY I WANTED TO GO TO SCHOOL ACROSS AN OCEAN.  My dad is JUST SO MUCH WORK.  (no kidding kid...that is why I divorced him and why he is still alone). 

DD says.."Mom if I went to you and said hey I'm going to Dads for dinner your answer would have been cool..have fun. Maybe we can do dinner next week or something.  You wouldn't have been all..you don't love me...blah blah blah.  I just wanted to relax on my day off...I did not want to deal with that drama.  I gave him an alternative but because it wasn't what HE wanted it wasn't good enough. Like just being with me wasn't good enough for him.  Too bad then..I wasn't about to jump through hoops just to make him happy.  Not my job"

woohoo...at least my DD is catching on...as an adult she doesn't have to make the VI happy and his misery is all of his own making.