The case of the missing toddler jogging suit..A B* Chronical
In the beginning there there was only one set of clothes to clothe the skids. Bags would be packed and would be with skids as they pass back and forth. Alas, DH realized he would only receive the clothes that were too small, stained or just plain fugggglly. He began to buy his own clothes and finally told the Beaver...keep the bag I have my own clothes.
Now, this made the Beaver angry..how DARE Dh have clothes for his own kids. She is the MOOOTTTTHHHHER she will buy their clothes. This was said to DH in an email. DH..whatever...hit the ignore button. He would take the clothes the kids wore when they arrived, wash them and they would wear them back home. Narry a sock of his left his house. This was a PITA since they switched houses every other day. (That had to be the most stupid and confusing schedule to ever be. Even NASA couldn't keep track that schedule)
A few years later when SD was about 3 or 4 it was Christmas time. The skids came to our house on December 23rd for DH's regularly schedule day. It was his year for Christmas Eve so they were there for two whole days. Angels Rejoiced..During all the hub bub over Christmas we forgot to wash the $5.00 joggers and shirt from wallworld that Beaver sent SD in. It was a mess when SD arrive on the 23rd. Covered in what I could only determine was syrup which in turn had picked up every single fiber of dog hair she came in contact with.
Being normal humans we put in SD in a $5.00 wallworld suit that we didn't really care about to send her back to her moms at 7 a.m. on Christmas morning. You know instead of sending her back naked or in a jogging suit covered in enough hair she would look like a tiny dog. End of Story right.........
Hahahahahahahahahah...NO of course not. Beavermobile arrives, skids sent out, get in car, we close the door. 2 minutes later, doorbell rings (oh great dog is not going ape sh*t cause the door bell rang). DH opens the door and SS who is about 8 or 9 says Mommy wants SD jogging suit back. DH, its in the wash I will have it for her when I pick you up tomorrow. SS ok...skips off to the car. 2 minutes later, door bell rings again (dog is really off her rocker now)..its SS again. Mommy has to have the track suit she doesn't have anything else for SD to wear. Dh (visiably annoyed that SS is back doing Beavers bidding): Seriously, yes she does have other clothes and its the wash and I will bring it tomorrow. SS: ok
We are thinking this is now over...oh no......not yet.
Doorbell rings again...I open the door this time. I find the Beaver standing in the doorway.
Halo: Can I help you? (in my head..can I help you find a bus to stand in front of?)
Beaver: Give me SD's track suit NOW.
Halo: No it's in the wash. I'm not going to go downstairs and dig through laundry to find it. You will get it tomorrow.
Beaver: Give it to me now.
Halo: NO, get off my porch and go home before I call the cops. For the future..DO NOT send SS to do your bidding.
With that I slammed the door in her face.
She rang the doorbell again and we just refused to answer. She finally left.
True to his word. DH had the wallyworld jogging suit, clean, the next day for her when he picked up the kids.
Funny...we never saw our wallyworld track suit again. It would be just one of the many items that disappeared in the black hole of the beaver damn.
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Glad we aren't the only
Glad we aren't the only family that does this. SS always comes in clothes that don't fit. I used to send him back in whatever but then I ended up with a bunch of too small/ratty clothes. Now he wears what he comes in. It's always clean thiugh
Oh but wait....there is MORE
After Beaver realized the kids were going to go back in whatever crappy *ss thing she sent them in, we got an email.
It seems that wearing clothes more than one time in a week tramatized poor little SS. We are awful hateful people...he can't possibly were things more than once in a week.
DH ...too bad, so sad...
Thankfully, this was one area
Thankfully, this was one area that BM didn't make too much fuss about. We bought a lot of thrift store and clearance rack clothes for SS and he wore whatever he wanted from either house back and forth. He wasn't picky in the least and a $2 shirt from Goodwill was fine with him.
For most of them, it's yet another control thing. Usually, though - the want the ex to buy new clothes so they don't have to, hence the sending them over in stuff that doesn't fit.
DH bought most of kids
DH bought most of kids clothes from goodwill. Here there is good quality and selection. They got new clothes from kohls, target, old navy, etc for xmas or if I happened to see a good sale. BMs mother bought them clothes from Justice so one of the girls started getting snobby about the goodwill clothes....but our goodwill had clothes from justice and old navy.
Argh - clothes for Skids
BM never sends SSs with anything. She never has. She used to send them with a list of items she wanted DH to buy on his weekends and send home with SSs. She did this because in her mind he wasn't paying enough child support - even though his payment was calculated using the income worksheet for our state and even though she underreported her income on that sheet. DH used to do that because he is a fool. I should mention that BM makes about three times what DH does, so she is not hurting for money, just incensed that's she can't milk DH for every dollar.
They always come in ratty sweats or shorts leading us to buy clothing (that they typically wear once) any time there is a gathering that requires anything other than ratty clothes or anytime anything other than shorts or a t-shirt are needed. We even bought winter coats one year for them to wear for four days because DH wanted to take them to the family cabin to play in the snow. It gets cold enough where we are that you need a winter coat if you are going to be outside for more than 5 minutes, but according to BM it was "not her responsibility" to provide winter coats just for them to use at DH's house. We have also bought clothes for them to wear at our home and surprise, surprise, they disappear, so I no longer buy anything. I'm also not a mind reader or a detective, so I don't try to figure out if things still fit and don't want to listen to complaints at the last minute if one SS wants to wear something different and nothing fits.
They stayed at MIL's once as a favor to us and I sent clothes to MIL's home because I knew SSs didn't bring anything. I took pictures of all the clothes I sent. Only half came back. MIL sent all the nicest clothes home with SSs and said, "I hope that's not a problem." Of course, not, MIL.
Now, SSs come and wear the same outfit all weekend and I don't care.
Ugh...my post error'd out...
Ugh...my post error'd out....short version: BM went ape over a sock that got left in the dryer. Put a note in kid's bag it was illegal for him to keep that sock. And one time she got the girls to bring all the underwear we bought for our house to her house.
Sock stealer!
Sock stealer!
OMG
Your BM and the Beaver is a clone of the Girhippo who lives in a messy, pig stye hovel. When she did a wash she would leave the laundry to sour in the washer for days and then just throw it into the dryer to bake that smell in!!
One day Pumpkinhead (OSS , then 9) came bolting into my house like a SWAT team and started upturning every sofa cushion. "Mom says all of our socks are here!"
Highly doubtful... more likely the Gorhippo hadn't done a wash in days and it was probably in a pile underneath a bed somewhere.
She would send the ferals in designer rags that were ripped, filthy, stained and two sizes too small for them. Even the HousesHtter at age 2 would say "too tight" and point to his shoes.
When we did buy them nice clothes, they would go home to the Girhippos and never be seen again. I ended up getting thrift store clothes that they could play in then dress them back in the clothes they came in with to go back to the Mothership.
The BM Vortex/BIack Hole. Took a long time for Chef to realize that toys, games and good clothes would never come back when sent to the Girs.
I call it the
Blackhole Beaver Dam..or the Beaver Motel...things go in but don't come out...
The more I read this site I
The more I read this site I find it fascinating how many BMs here don't buy their kids clothes. When skids would go to BMs (every other weekend) she always had old stuff that was too small. Most of the stuff at her house was bought by SO anyways.
The nail in coffin for BM was when I bought SD her dress for her 5th grade father daughter dance. I bought her dress the year before that and SO bought her her dress the other 3 years for this dance.
She got all pissed. I AM HER MOTHER I AM SUPPOSE TO BE DOING THESE THINGSSS.
Well, that lead into our fight, lead to court, and BM not taking them anymore. skids have been there Xmas eves the last two years and that's it. She hasn't bought a single article of clothing for SD or the boys (it's in the new agreement that SO is responsible for cost for EVERYTHING. He didnt go after her for child support either just wanted primary custody) even though she is the one that's suppose to be doing that right??
Hahahaha this brought back
Hahahaha this brought back memories. Memories of BM beating on our door for 15 minutes because 6 and 8 year old SDs allegedly left their "bras" at our house and she couldn't possibly go home without them. Maybe there ARE some 6 & 8 year old girls who need to wear bras, but my SDs were rail thin at those ages and they didn't need them. It was amazing. Even more amazing when she followed up her in person meltdown with SEVERAL texts and emails accusing ME of "stealing" their bras. To what purpose, only BM can guess because I, a full grown woman, had no children at the time nor did I even know any children who wore baby sized bras. I was so irritated at the time, but now it is one of my favorite BM stories to tell. *ROFL*
Shortly after that (and an incident about socks) we bought a full wardrobe to keep at our house. And then, like you, we were accused of abusing them by forcing them to wear the same thing back to BM that they'd arrived in. Doesn't everyone know kids can't wear the same thing twice in 8 days?!
LOL @ you "stealing" the baby
LOL @ you "stealing" the baby bras.
BM has accused us of stealing pillows from her house (not sure how since SSs have never brought pillows to our house). She also once accused DH of "ruining SS's life" because we didn't send his football pants home with him...only to get a text from her 45 minutes later saying, "nevermind, we found them."
BM's house is a mess, so she likes to blame us whenever she can't find something.
Oh Yeah
The accusations fly and then an hour later "nevermind we found (insert item.)"
LOL..we get the
Mom's says x, y,z are here and your stealing them. MMM..KKKK..yea no. My is really now, well when you find it here let me know. I know full well and good what it is isn't here becaues you know...we CLEAN and do laundry regularly. DH says when he was marred to the Beaver she wouldn't do laundry and would just buy new underwear/sock, etc when she had none left.