It is crazy out there and unfortunate we are the majority. More than likely you didn’t marry your high school sweet heart and the marriage isn’t lasting forever. Almost everybody who does not want to be alone is going to end up with a divorce past.

It is crazy.
It is like we are all in a raging mini war and if you really think about it. It is stupid as hell because it is nothing but about

“Control”

A friend and I talked about back when we were young. We were just 14 and we were dreaming of our future. I am sure it was like most dreams.
You grow up, you fall in love with this great guy that you suppose to have children with, your love and the children suppose to bond you forever and you grow old together and watch your children bring you grand children.

I doubt back then we all plan we are going to marry someone that has been divorce and be on the war path either with the kids or the BM or BF.
I doubt any of us dream about how nasty things were going to get
Controlling BM’s mostly controlling their kids’ behavior against the SM.
I doubt that most SM’s had plans going into a marriage knowing kids existed and thought they were going to cut the kids out of the dads’ lives so the SM can be number 1.

This seems to be the mentality that most BM’s like to play on. Oh well your dad married a new woman, daddy will no longer have time loving you. It is Bull Crap like this that turns kids. It confuses the horse shit out of them.

Kids don’t up and decide they are going on the war path to save their mommy and daddy. Mommy and daddy inbred this stupid behavior into the kids.

Children are technically easy to mold. You don’t have your mom and daddy correcting the behavior it is no wonder that step families are a mess.

A friend of mine just got through adopting 5 kids from the ages from an infant to 6 years of age. I have watched she and the kids interact and none of them has wonder much about their real parents. No poison behavior going on. All 5 loved by this one woman looks forward seeing this woman from the ones waking up staying with her to the ones that cannot wait to get home from school and all the children in laughter and all calling her mommy with no problem. All accepted as brother and sister even though none of them are related to one another. Seeing it is a beautiful thing.

I cannot blame for some step parents disengaging. It is really the BM and BF fault!
Step parents are really no more than Step nanny’s because the step children are not going to care for the SP. You are not part of them they will not be at your funeral when you die. Step children are vial because of their parents.

I think my step kids are beautiful good looking kids and that is just it. They are to follow the rules to not mess up the house, keep their part clean, wash their own clothes, and to take care of themselves. They are old enough to do so. Other than that! They are not my responsibility.

I refuse to buy them high price presents over the fact that the BM controls them. If she feels they are having too much fun here and she is not head of anarchy of the plans she pulls them out of our lives.

They are not to have any more fun then she can give them.

Which the mother of them is so stupid because she does not realize how much she is the one cutting a lot of stuff out of their lives.

They are not allowed to take high price items home because the BM is known to take the stuff and pawn them or go trade it out for something for her. She will call it being the kids stuff then takes it and uses it.
We were going to buy them tablets this year but they would not be able to take them home (only because the BM would take them for herself or go pawn them for something for her to keep)

The BM decided we were not going to get them for the holidays this year. Her excuse is because they will be busy in their school extra circular activities. So we have decided to not get their tablets for them. I told him to keep it simple we could just send them stuff they need for Christmas, couple t shirts, jeans, school things. But they would not receive the tablets and fun things we had planned to get.

Thanks for listening to my mumbling