My SD13's mom lives with her parents (SD's grandparents). She has lived with them off and on for about a year. My DH has primary custody of SD, but during the summer, SD stays with BM every other week. During school, she only sees BM every other weekend. SD doesn't want to go see her mother, but does because the courts say she must. Her mother has a drug problem, can't keep a job (doesn't even really try to get one), and is very irresponsible (obviously). BM ran off and left SD last year and was gone (no phone calls, etc) for over 6 months, so it's pretty apparent why SD couldn't care less about mom.

Well, my SD13 called at 1:00 am Tuesday night (Wednesday morning) to tell me that her mom and grandpa (mom's dad) had got in a big fight and her mother had left. She said she was going to stay the rest of the night with grandma, but could we come and get her the next day so that she could go to cheerleading practice. I did pick her up and on the way to practice, her mother called. BM wanted to take SD to her Aunt's (BM's sister) for the rest of the week. SD said she didn't want to go up there. BM said fine, she could stay with grandma. SD said she didn't want to do that either. BM said well, where are you going to stay? (who's the parent in this conversation?!?!) SD said, I'm going to my dad's. BM said fine. SD said that she saw BM later that afternoon - was in the same house with her for about 30 minutes - and BM wouldn't speak to her or even look at her.

We now have "possession" of SD during BM's court assigned visitation time. It's going on 3 days now and BM hasn't called to even check on SD.

OK - all that backstory for this question: Should DH make an effort to get SD back to BM since it is her legally-assigned visitation time? What if the next legally-assigned visitation time comes along and we still have not heard from BM? My DH wants to just leave it alone as he feels that it is BM's responsibility to get things arranged. I agree, but I'm not sure how the courts will see it. I wouldn't put it past this woman to try to convince the courts that we are keeping SD from her and even accuse us of kidnapping (though SD would set the judge straight) Thoughts????

Thanks!