I received a request on facebook from a former SD. She was He11 on Wheels. She really had two crappy parents who really only cared about getting back at each other than parenting her. I basically left the relationship with her father when he got full custody of her because of his bad parenting.

First a little Background

Her father was one of those disney dads that didn't have a lot of money so he compensated by letting her do basically whatever she wanted. She also was a stubborn child and needed a little more effort in parenting but it was just too hard for him to parent her (he actually said that). Of course, he would have to yell and scream at her for about 1 to 2 hours first but she still did whatever she wanted.

I would always try to tell SD she needed to do better in school and go to college. She would tell me she wasn't smart enough because everyone told her she was dumb. My response to her was "then I guess you will have to prove everyone wrong.".

The Straw that Broke the Camels back

I came home from work to an argument between SD and her father. It was a huge shouting match as usual. SD told him that she was going to hurt herself and call 911 and tell them that he did it. He was such a coward. The man literally got down on his knees and was begging her not to call. She then mentioned that she would tell them that I hit her. I hadn't even said one word to her or him that day. I was so fed of with it that I tossed SD my cell phone told her to call 911. I told her that the police had a 12 minute response time, I was getting a pen a paper and writing down what she told the cops because I WAS NOT going to jail for something I did not do. She looked at me the deer in the head lights eyes. She stood up, handed me back my phone (didn't call 911) and went to her room. Her father and I got into a big argument at that time. I basically told him he was a piss poor father and that she deserved to have someone who would stand up and be a parent. I started planning my escape and left a few weeks afterwards.

Fast Forward to Now.

I decided to send her a message just to see what she wanted. She told me that she wanted to thank me for encouraging her all those years ago. Her father had been through numerous girlfriends since I left the relationship. SD's behavior escalated. She was put in a group home and later into foster care. She told me that she always liked me because I didn't put up with her BS. She remembers the conversation I had with her dad and actually told me word for word what I said to her about calling 911. She told me, that all she wanted was for him to be my dad and punish me when she misbehaved. I tried to tell him but he wouldn't listen. She no longer has a relationship with her dad.

She also told me that she is a CNA at the hospital in another state and that she has been accepted into the nursing program at the hospital and that she is going to be a nurse because she wanted to prove everyone who thought she wasn't smart enough wrong.

Honestly, I thought this child would be in jail by the time she was 18 years old. I never knew that she was placed in foster care because her dad could no longer control her. She said she has looked for me for a few years to tell me that she was glad that I was in her life even for a short period of time. I told her that I was so proud of her. She said during her childhood I was the only one that ever encouraged her to go to college.

I feel so bad because all she wanted was for her father to stand up and be a father.

I actually had tears in my eyes reading her post. I am glad she reached out to me. It really made my day.