When my DH went back for a remod of his CO the following was added:

1) transportation Parent that has the child(ren) is responsible to drop the child(ren) off to the receiving parent. (That means she drops to you, you drop to her)

2) Medical: related to any shared medical expenses not covered by insurance. The parent taking the child for care must pay the bill IN FULL at the time of service. Within 30 days a receipt showing paid in full must be provided to the other party (parent). Receiving parent has 30 days from the time of receipt to reimburse the original parent. (English: she takes the kid to the doc. Pays the $50.00 copay then and there. within 30 days has to provide you the receipt showing paid in full. Once she gives it to you, you have 30 days from that date to pay your ordered share. If she fails to give it to you in the time frame provided, tough cookies you do not have to pay her. (same applies in reverse)

3) Travel: each parent must notify the other 72 hours in advance (in writing) of intent to take the child out of state for vacations. And that out of state vacations must be limited to a maximum of 14 days.

4) Withholding of visitation/custody: we had this problem at one point with BM. It was written into the CO that if she withheld from DH his custodial time that she would be in contempt, and be fined $500.00 per day per child. The day the order was signed all custodial interference STOPPED COLD.

5) Child support: each parent must alert the courts to any increase or decrease of salary of 10% or more annually. This recently bit BM in the ass. She got a 64% raise with a promotion (24k a year up to 40k a year) and did not bother telling the courts. When DH found out she now owes him in excess of 12k in child support back. We got our paperwork yesterday, her wage garnishment to pay this back at $300 a month starts in May. (He still owes her $254 a month. So his check gets jacked for 254.00 then hers gets jacked for 300.00 DOR has weird ways of doing things).

6) CS covers lunch money (I read on here of a lady having issues with that.) CP should be responsible for lunches at school period. IF you have a 50/50 split (like we do) and your CS is dramatically reduced due to it, then yes, the parent who has the kid(s) that week should pay. But if your CO time is less than half, that is the resp on the CP.

7) basic needs: clothing, shoes, school supplies, food, shelter are covered in CS. Get that in the CS order. Otherwise your BM will try like ours used to, to send us a bill for "half" of anything she bought for the kids. (No, we never paid those bills, yes she took it to court and the judge reamed her due to "he is paying for half as he has to buy all that same crap at his house while they are there for his 50%)

extra-curricular: if you don't get a say in the sign up for it, you don't have to pay the bill. This goes for all sports, dance lessons, horseback riding lessons, church summer camps etc. If BM doesn't ask if its "ok" with you and for you to pay half: its her issue to pay for. If she asks, and you say no, and she signs them up anyway: her issue to pay for (same in reverse).

9) If your DH or she is super religious: you might want a clause in there on who has authority to choose the childs religion. That way you aren't dragging her to a baptist church while mom is having her baptized catholic.

Understand you will not get everything you want. Minor holidays (vday/ halloween) are not normally addressed by the court. That is what "coparenting" is supposed to cover. You will never get a court order that says a child has to be in bed at both houses by 8, or that mom has to make the kid start doing chores at age 9. Each parent is allowed to make the rules in their own house for bed times, homework (or lack thereof) chores, curfews etc. ROFR is pretty easy to get. Ask for it all... the little piddly stuff give up in mediation to show you are "working with her" so you can get the bigger ticket items that are needed for the skids and your families security.

Make sure you get TIMES for holidays. Ours is very specific on when a holiday begins and ends (ie, 10am the day of the holiday until 10am the following day). I doubt the courts will address minor holidays (Halloween, v-day), they usually fall where they fall, if its on your custodial day, you get to celebrate, if its on BMs custodial day she gets celebrate. Address birthdays. We get SD on dh's birthday every year. Transportation is huge. Vacation - notice, how much time (indicate that the other party can't take vacation over your weekend or holiday).

One other thing comes to mind

An END DATE for CS. Typically you have to go back to court to petition to end CS. We got an end date written into the cs order for each of the kids.

So if your skid turns 18 in Feb 2013 but doesn't graduate until June 2013, you can have June 2013 written in as an end date for CS. (This also helped prompt BM into being more on task with the kids homework, once she realized their failing classes would not buy her more time on the CS gravy train). Separate dates for each skid as they age out (always at 18 or graduation from hs) with corresponding "new" CS amounts that are to replace prior once a child has aged out. (Example to make it easy to understand: 3 kids. CS of $300.00 a month. Kid one ages out, CS then falls to 200.00 a month continue on down until all kids have aged out.)

Our BM tried to get out of this asking what if one fails a grade and has to repeat, then it would go until 19. That we fought by reminding her she is MOTY and we "know" she would "never" allow her children to fail. That as a parent it is her responsibility to hold them accountable for their grades. She hated it. But we got it.