Stop caring, stop cooking, stop cleaning (if challenged by your DuH, look surprised and say that as his daughter has bugger all to do all day you figured she'd be doing all that to earn her keep. If he gets mad, point out that its his job to tell her what to do, not yours) pretend she doesn't exist, find things to do that bring you pleasure. 

I see you’ve entered your rage/villain era of step life.  Welcome I was there a few years ago and was bound and determined to make life a living hell for DH and Spawn, but in reality, all I was doing was driving myself crazy obsessing over something neither of them cared about.  The best way to handle this is to go out and live your best life and not even acknowledge them.  I did this with Spawn a long time ago and despite me talking about her on here, she doesn’t even really take up any head space for me anymore.  As for DH it took longer for me to start living my best life rather than waiting around hoping he would get better.  It’s taken him some time, but he notices, he follows me around like a sad sack after work looking for my validation and for the most part I ignore.  It’s finally dawning on him that I meant what I said, I’m giving the same energy I get.  Give the same energy you get Clove, focus on you and your happiness. 

What exactly does she do all day now? Is she looking for a job? I think if she doesn't want to get a job OR sign up for school she should be sent to live at her lazy moms 

CLOVE..

Here is the problem.. you are doing all these double secret probation things.. and no one really cares.. or if they care about the annoyances.. they just think you are being an Ahole.  Nothing you are doing is likely to push any of them to do anything different.

What is your goal.  just to be annoying and make them as irritated as you possibly can.. is THAT the end GOAL?

Or is your end goal to have your "goddess of sloth" no longer living in your home.. aka.. she is not a resident.. but may come by to visit dad.. but not stay over and have that room to yourself.

Or.. is your goal for her to miracle like be motivated to work, get her license.. her passport and be the nice little munchkin you used to think was your buddy?

Is your goal to divorce your husband and be done with them all?  lol

WHAT do you want... because you need to figure THAT out and plainly communicate that.. no more passive aggressive petty BS that has no clear goal or outcome..and only serves to keep you centrally mired in the drama.. and being a full participant to the dysfunction.

I think you are probably fooling yourself if you think you can make yourself a big enough irritant that she will leave on her own accord.  She is related to a mother who has zero moral compass.. and a sister that has no pride in how low she has stooped either.. and your husband is lazy and would be fine just letting you suffer.. as long as he can fish and drink beer with his barnacle buddy.  She has both nature and nurture against her.. her genetic makeup from parents.. crap.. her parenting from both parents.. crap.

I, unfortunately, think you have little leverage here because your husband just doesn't care all that much.. he is fine how things are.. and isn't concerned that you aren't.

Now.. you cannot care more than her parents.. would her being employed.. going to school.. getting her license be good for her? sure and obv it would be in your interest for her to launch because it would be easier for her to want to be on her own than you to have to push for it... yeah.. of course.. can YOU do one thing to make any of that happen?. NOPETY NOPE.

So, if you want something to happen.. you have to make it a hill to die on.  And that means plainly going to your husband and saying.

I am not going to allow your daughter to live here .. even part time.. unless she is going to school AND working at least a part time job.  Or.. if she isn't.. and you want her here.. YOU will pay ME 500 dollars a month to compensate for the use of her room.. and to compensate ME for the aggravation of dealing with this extra person..  and if he chooses the money.. and you give him that option. then you have to just STFU basically and deal with her being there.. and not "care" that she is slothing.  You can insist her room be kept sanitary.. and house rules on guests etc.. but you can't continually push for her to "adult".. he will be buying your silence there.. and you will have to proverbially "let it goooo"  I might also suggest in that vein.. that if you are getting compensated for her presence.. stop trying to figure out how to annoy her with chores.. just make your husband do the stuff you don't feel like doing.. if he wants to enlist his kid.. that's on him.

But, again.. what do you want your outcome to look like.. and tell your husband plainly that.  if that isn't workable for him.. he can tell you that and you can go to a divorce atty.

My dear girl, doesn't it make you sad when you think of the mental energy you're putting into monitoring and being upset by this lazy adult in your house when it's exponentially more than the mental energy either one of them is burning........combined?

You're the only one who cares.

And the ONLY person you can really influence is your husband. The only............ONLY.............way this is ever going to change is when your husband feels the discomfort.

You have to have big balls to tell him you've had enough of this. Are you ready to make HIS life uncomfortable to get your message across? What are you willing to do? Go on strike and refuse to do ANYthing around the house because, if it's okay for HER, it should be okay for YOU, right? Be absent as much as possible? Not have sex with your husband? Charge your husband a fee for his adult squatter? Move out?

Your passive aggressive head games are not working. What's next? What are you willing to do?

I love ya however I'm gonna be crass for a moment.

Are you giving your husband the business? If so cut him off until all your demands are met. *ROFL*

DUP DELETE

You are expending countless hours of thinking on what to do and then the energy doing it and thinking about it. As ESMOD said, they do NOT care (your DH and SD). And really, what's the end goal? Do you want her out of your home? Or, for her to stay and try to make her miserable? I'm not a fan of Passive Agressive behaviors, which is the catagory this falls into. I'm BLUNT, especially these days. Personally, I'd gather up my thoughts and put the energy into telling your DH, "she has a launch date and it's X. Make sure you get her ready in time." And hold fast to it.

Here's an example from my life recently. DHs son/wife came to our home last year AGAINST my wishes but DH wanted it and "won." I was a horrible host. I did not cook, rarely spoke to them and at some times, outright ignored them. It was a miserable 3 days for all...or so I thought. Fast forward to this year. Guess who wants to come stay again. Yep. DHs son/wife. This time, I stood strong and said no. But I was completely stunned that they'd want to return to our home, after they were treated so poorly. I guess a free place to stay over-ruled my "ugly." 

So, think hard about what you are doing and what outcome you want. Also take into account that what you are doing really isn't impacting them at all and giving them fuel to speak even more ill about you. Just my thoughts.

I like the way you think. Been there, done that too. I'm currently considering having a police wellness check done on her at the dorms, since she can't effing answer the damned phone. Her one request of her dad "Don't embarrass me in front of my new friends." Yeah, well I'm sure your new friends won't think its embarrassing that the police showed up to make sure you weren't dead.

Have you ever considered that DH is acting like this to DRIVE YOU away?  Weak man he is, you paint a very poor picture of the man over the years.  I can't see him asking for a divorce but is he pathetic enough to wait for you to do it?  

Clove you have more power than you realize. 
 

Powersulk is now a regular schmegular adult now and you can boot her out of your home without legal recourse - unless she turns into a squatter (there is no obligation to her now that she is aged out of the child support system). plus she has a home to go to ... her breeders government subsided lair

Your husband can get the boot too (pack his compression socks, his blood pressure meds, and all his junk in a box shipped one way to toxic trolls lair) if he continue to allow this overgrown adult to disturb your peace in your home that you pay bills in if he dare challenge you. 
 

From my experience these extreme Disney dads (with their toxic a$$ exes and their lazy leeching spawns) will do nothing to improve themselves for the better if they think you're always going to stand by them no matter how dysfunctional 

If it was me, I'd bluntly tell him that you need PSDN to move in with her mom full time. 
 

If she gets a job and goes to online "college" would you really be happy with her living there? Don't give them false hope if what you really want is her out of your house. Give it time thought and exactly what you need. Would you be open to visitation once a week? Overnight in the converted guest room? Of you would be ok with her staying provided she has a job and is going to college, think about how many hours you need her to work and how many classes you need her to take. If you give an inch they might take a mile. 

Keep doing everything you are doing, add more, and go boss bitch on them.

It is your life, you enjoy it.  When you go out for dinner, or to the beach, leave a big note on the marker board "I'm out for the day. You two get the kitchen fully cleaned and the dishes put away, the bathrooms cleaned completely, and do the vacuuming and mopping of the floors.  If they are not done when I get home, I will call a cleaning service and you two will pay for it.  Does PPSDN have an ID or a job yet? If not, she can be our unpaid chore bitch. Have a great day!"

Get the cams and forward the PPSDN waste of skin footage to DH regularly asking what is she doing all day since she is not in school, not working, and not living with the T-Troll?

Lather, rinse, repeat.

While you are doing the ever increasing boss bitch list effort with both of them keep reminding them that FF taught you and DH what will not be tolerated from a kidult in your marriage and direct PPSDN's ire at her idiot crook of a sister.

The ever increasing chore list from hell and escalating discomfort was the burning platform needed to get SS to launch. It took 8mos but he did launch and successfully at that.  Basic shelter and food when it takes them countless hours of misery and lack of self determination works great to singe their tail feathers to get them to leap off of the burning platform.

DH does not need to participate. All you have to do is keep the heat turned up and get PPSDN to GTF out whether daddy likes it or not. His level of life enjoyment will degrade until she leaves. Conversely, it will instantly improve and continue to improve once she is gone. Another pressure point to consider is the message to DH that you will pay half of housing and food costs only when it is only the two of you in the house. If one or more of his spawn are present, he pays all the bills.  Now that the spawn are adults, all bets are off and all money is cut off that in anyway benefits them.

Have fun!

He's letting his DD do nothing and is ok with it.  Working on DH is your first move.  As tell DH either his kids go, or you will stop working and start doing nothing with SD.  I would never work, and support a ungrateful, disrespectful SD.   BUT until you make up your mind and do something .  This will continue.   Or if you don't want to stop working. Your. whold pay check goes into a bank account in your name only.  And you asked DH for money to buy food and pay the bills.  
'You must stop everyone walking all over you.  This SK thing will never end. The kids want to do nothing and they need a place to live, food to eat. Ect 

CLove, I love you more than I love my luggage, so you know it's a lot. (extra points if you know the movie I kind of quoted)

but...

I think you're fighting a battle that has no enemy. You can't fight a battle without another side and they are not fighting. In their lives, nothing has changed. At least their activity level has not changed. 

What would happen if you bluntly said, to the both of them, "how long is sluggo going to be doing nothing, paying nothing and accomplishing nothing?" 

Would he erupt? would she pull out the tears and the sad little girl face? what if you asked it and then said nothing.

then followed up a few days later with, "it's unfair to not split bills three ways since there are three able bodied adults living here. I will be only paying my third from now on, it's up to you two to decide how you'll pay the rest."

Then walk away and go do your thing. no games no one but you is playing. no sitting there expecting excuses. no nothing but this is how it is. 

"Ways to irritate & other things" 

Step 1. Tell them you'll be contributing 1/3 of the rent and bills starting this month. 

Step 2. Contribute only a third of said bills. 

So much good feedback here. I hope you know that all of on this board think so highly of you and want you to be happy. 

I'll not beat a dead horse, but just say that I agree that any energy you put into these people is wasted. They simply do not care what you do or don't do, your attempts to irritate them are really only hurting yourself. Communicate the financial stuff that you need to, and then actually disengage. In every way. I just don't think that doing anything at all to/for/with them is going to get you any closer to whatever your ultimate goal is. I'm sorry this is the hand you've been dealt. You deserve to live with people who have even the tiniest bit of consideration for you, but that's just not the situation you're in right now.