Well I knew it was coming, I posted previous about MIL showing favoritism for SS, over my two boys. I had also been picking up on some "resentful" tones from her toward me, the past few times I had been there. Last week she is waiting for DH at work, and had written him this long letter. It basically asked "why he doesn't come home more often" and also that she wished he would come home more often. Excuse me he has a home, it is here with his family. The exact phrasing, was " I wish YOU would come home more often". That made me feel like she obviously wants him around without his family. She asked about SS , and didn't mention my boys who are nuts about dh, and have called him Daddy the past 3 years.

A few days later, she leaves another note on the front door stating that out of town relatives were coming to town, and we should really stop by. Problem was it was on a day that dh had to work, and we were all sick with a cold anyway. The relatives wouldn't really make a big deal about us not coming by, they understand we have a life. I also sent them an email to inform them why we weren't there to visit.

Cut to the chase we go visit MIL, and she begins basically scolding DH that he didn't come by to visit said relatives, told him how disappointed she was, and supposedly they were too. I said well oldest son and I were very sick with a cold, and I had a sinus infection. Her response to DH was well you could have stopped by before going to work. She had a real sting to it when she said it also.

Well a few minutes later, dh and I are discussing a financial issue with her, and all hell breaks loose. See dh was left responsible for all the marital debt after the divorce, BM made out like a bandit. She got half house sale, part of his pension, child support, and none of the debt.

This debt combined with child support, affects our finances negatively. She asks DH well why are you having financial issues, you never did before. I take this to mean before chelle. So I start to explain to her why the situation is the way it is, and she snaps " I was asking DH", I got up and told dh it's time to leave, and head out into another room to get my coat. Meanwhile MIL is sitting there putting on the I have medical issues, and don't need this. Then she starts on dh again about the finances, I walk back in the room ready to go, DH by this time is telling her that it isn't my fault. I try to explain to her calmly yet again, why our financial situation is what it is, and she tells him, I am telling you right now you need to get her out of here.

Now I really do feel for MIL's medical issues, but I feel like I also don't deserve to be talked to the way she was speaking to me. I figure you shouldn't dish it out, if you can't take it. Am I wrong? I am beating myself up over this, but it really hurt my feelings. I am not sure that I can just let this go, if and when someone tries to make amends. I feel like while I have genuine love for these people, it was a farce on their part. DH is totally behind me, and agrees with me 100%. Anyone else have a similar situation? Advice on how to handle is much appreciated.

By the way how is it we always get the blame when there are problems, but get none of the credit when things are going well.