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My DH & I have been together now for 41/2 years, but he had his first major "step" moment this christmas, while my kids were here. My DH got a nice christmas bonus from work, $$ to put towards buying a new flat screen t.v. We have been wanting one for a while, and the tv we had was very , very old. So this was a wonderful surprise. Anyways, while we were out looking, my BS, who is 10, pipes up and says that his dad is also now looking to buy a flatscreen that very same day.(my son told his dad on the phone what we were doing that day, so he had to do it too, I guess???) My son told this to my DH, and my DH did not say anything at the time, but last night we were talking, and he told me what my son said, and how much it aggrivated him. DH's thoughts on this, is he does not want to hear about what my EX is doing, and finds it annoying when he is brought up alot by the my kids. He was laughing a bit about how annoyed he was, and my response was WELCOME TO MY WORLD! I'm not mad, actually it was funny to me, and I reminded him how I have had to deal with this same issue for ALL of the time we have been together from not only the skids, but his family too. We compared notes, and he realized a little bit of how I must feel sometimes. Itold him there will always be moments like this, and he is at square one with this (annoyed stage), but by the time he gets to my square (square 5,shrugg it off,disengage) it will be easier to deal. For every year we have together , I have tried to move up a square, almost to the one where I can just go deaf at those moments! LOL. Our new t.v. is great, a modest 32 inch LG............I suppose my Ex's will be bigger, but we don't want to know. LA-LA-LA, CAN'T HEAR YOU, LA-LA-LA. 
- Chel Bell's blog
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Comments
Ha ha.
I hope he enjoyed it! Because lord knows I always hear about mommy, what mommy is doing, what they ate for dinner, what they did today, what they'll do tomorrow, my favorite is the stories of when mommy and daddy were together!
It's always funny when they get a taste of what we've delt with for years.
l
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Oh
I don't care if the skids mention their mother. What bugs me are the conversations (that can last for half an hour) about cousin this or aunt that----and I have no interest in, don't know, and don't give a rat's arse about. To me that is just rude. I don't let my kids do that to my dh. My kids are a little older and are better educated than his kids---so it is to be expected that they do this kind of thing. When I have had enough, I leave the room. They only come over a few times a year (birthdays/holidays) so I just handle it quietly.
RUDE: Having conversations that EXCLUDE one member of the group. It is like 4 friends speaking a foreign language in front the 5th friend that is monolingual. JUST PLAIN RUDE.
Someone needs to write an Emily Post style book on etiquette for step families.
I feel that way too
I don't care what SD9 says about BM--what they do or what they have. But it really bothers my H. He tells her to be quiet, he doesn't care about BM!! LOL!! But like you I don't want to hear about them since I don't know anything about them. Why would I care? I just listen and SD stops quickly if no response.
I would so buy that!
I had a good talk with my kids while they were here about talking about their father, and how there are just some things that don't need to be said. They are pretty good about what, and how much they say, but sometimes things pop out. As I'm sure they do on their fathers end as well. I know some of it is normal, just as long as it is not excessive, or always in front of my DH. That is how I wish things would be for me."~waiting on the world to change~"
no kidding!
i SOOOOO wish DH could walk a mile in my shoes, and feel the way i do about the whole situation, even if just for a minute. not that i want him to feel the pain that i do, but just so he'd understand. and im sure he would want me to understand how he feels too. im glad ur DH got a taste and im glad it was on a humourous level!
also, so glad u had a great time w ur kids! so very happy for u!
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
The "Dad's is bigger" thing can be really anoying.
The good news in our situation is that about the only thing that "Dad" has that is bigger or unique is the number of illegitimate spawn (4) he has and a low rider Chevy. Neither of which I give a crap about other than his #1 illegitimate spawn (my SS).
My Wife's family has a severe case of the "I know someone who has"itis. These people don't have a pot to piss in our a window to throw it out of but they know someone who owns or has done everything possible on the planet. I am really not interested in what people they know have done or own. I am very interested in knowing what they have been doing and how their lives are progressing.
Hopefully all of our kids/Skids can experience good lives for themselves and will get past the my mom/dad has a bigger ....... Until they get their own lives I guess as blended family bio/Sparents we will have to deal with this annoying syndrome.
Personally I prefer to enjoy my own life and experiences VS living vicariously through others. There are many people on the planet who have more or have done more than I have or will ever do. But there are far more who have less and have done less.
I hope that everyone will see and do and have the things that I have done and that I continue to experience more.
For me I believe in the adage that the way to live life is to the fullest and to slide in to the curb at the pearly gates with the engine and tires smoking, wind blown hair, a few bugs in my teeth and greeting St Peter with a "What a ride, what's next on the other side of the fence?"
As for TV's. My wife and I purchased our first TV three years ago. Prior to that we got my parents hand me downs. Always very nice but not new. We milked the last one they gave us for ~6 years but when all of the people on the screen got to the point that they looked like cone-head dwarfs we knew it was time to drop some cash on a new TV. 42" DLP Arr Arrrr Arrrrr! (Man Grunt). Of course now you can get the same TV for about 1/3 of the price. I think I could have lived with the cone-head dwarfs for a few more years if I had known how much the price would drop. It will be the only TV we have until it falls apart. Then watch out, I am going for the auditorium seating size megga screen with 5000 horsepower surround sound that will be bigger than the rest of my house Arr, Arrrr , Arrrrr !!!!!!!!!!!!! (Sorry, the testosterone got out of control there.) :O
Congrats on the epiphany for your DH and the enjoyable time with your kids.
It sounds like you and DH had a good blended family bonding moment over the whole TV thing. Enjoy the new television. Hopefully it will be many years before you start seeing cone-head dwarfs on your screen.
Best regards,