You are here

BM is Not gonna like this one.

Chel Bell's picture

Submitted by Chel Bell on Sun, 03/01/2009 - 9:05am

But thats really just to bad for her. SS as of yesterday, has started communicating with me/us through myspace. I have had a page for a while now, but never talked to him on it because of BM. (of course she has one too). Well I got a friend request from him, and accepted it. Before I did, I made some minor changes to my page, taking out a few pics. and personal info, etc.just in case of anything. Then chatted with him for a while yesterday. It was nice, and great to see some of his pictures. He's a skater, and does alot of graphic art, so it was pretty cool. He was so happy to find us (a family member of mine let him know we had a page) so that was o.k. And he is looking forward to DH sending him some messages, and pics. Now when BM, finds out about this, she may not be happy, and if she tries anything nasty, it will ruin this for SS. I have no problem ditching the page, I only used it once in a while anyways, and SS will be pissed at her if she wrecks this for him. He really wants to talk to us, especially his dad, and loves seeing pics. of his little brother. I guess the last time my MIL picked up the skids a few weeks ago for a visit, BM said to my MIL "why don't you tell their dad to call them once in a while"....... WTF! MIL did not respond, they all walked away from her. MIL told me this in a e-mail the other day. Now my DH has called SS several times on SS cell phone, and 98% of the time, never gets a call back. (PAS anyone) and he has always spoken to them when my MIL has them. It's like the only time he can. I know what this is about, DH never calls their house phone/BM's phone to talk to them, and as far as DH is concerned,he never will. He does not want to hear her voice, or have anything to do w/ her when it comes to talking to skids. Calling SS on his cell phone should suffice. So I guess that now it's he never calls his kids, oh what a ass DH is, and woe as me, I'm the poor abandoned BM with skids, boo-hoo. Crap! BM plays this part no matter what, so we don't care. My DH was upset hearing this from MIL, he is getting sick of it. How about the skids calling back, or , DH remembers when he was SS age, and his father was divorced from MIL, that MIL used to make DH call his dad, even though his dad never called him. DH feels that MIL should remember that, before she gets on him about calling the skids. Geesh, one sentance out of BM like that, and everything goes sour! But, talking to SS on myspace will be something new, and we hope it works out. And as far as skids coming up here, this piece of news from MIL about BM made DH take a few steps back,we will rethink this plan if we need to, nothing is set in stone yet, and the ball is in DH's court. He is getting pretty tired of being pissed on, so we'll see what happens. Today after work, he plans on talking to SS on myspace, it will be good for both of them. Now he can leave him a message everyday if he wants to. And I told him that our profile is private, so BM would have to "pose" as SS to view it (no friend accept for her, LOL) and there is nothing on it that I'm worried about now. If she writes anything, I'll know it's her, and I'll take down the page. Then she can deal with her son being angry at her yet again. I would hate it to come to that, but at least we are trying. Smile

Comments

Most Evil's picture

Submitted by Most Evil on Sun, 03/01/2009 - 9:14am

That is so great you have a way to communicate with SS without his mom interfering. Our BM twists everything to make herself the victim too, and unfortunately my SD is following her mom's example, as BM is terrifying (and untreated bi-polar) to anyone who crosses her.

I hope this leads to SS knowing for an absolute fact, that you guys do love him and look forward to being together in the future.-!! no matter what he is told by his own mom.

"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin

stepmom2one's picture

Submitted by stepmom2one on Sun, 03/01/2009 - 3:12pm

I am sure that your SS will really enjoy talking back and forth on Myspace. It gives you, your H and SS access to each other all the time, without interference.

Doesn't it piss you off when the skids don't call back? My Hs ex is good for this. He just called last weekend (it was her weekend) and she did not answer so H left a message. No call back from SD, so H asked SD on the Wed he had her if she got the message. She said "no" and looked totally puzzled. He told her "well i called and no one called me back, I told your mom to have you call back" SD just said "well she didn't tell me." And SD acted like he was lying about! PAS, absolutely.

BridgingTheGap's picture

Submitted by BridgingTheGap on Sun, 03/01/2009 - 7:13pm

I wish I had a way to talk to the skids without having to deal with BM (they're a bit too young for myspace). Hopefully BM doesn't ruin this for SS and you and DH. Well, actually, let me add to that last statement; if BM does ruin this for SS, I hope he understands that its all HER FAULT!

StepG's picture

Submitted by StepG on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 7:46am

but I do not recall... are there no court orders that your H gets to see his kids? BM can suck her big toe if she does not like SS talking to you via myspace! I hope SS does see it is her fault if she ruins it for him! Oh and the comment tell there dad to call them sometime... I cannot stand that like she would politely let them talk to him or better yet why not have them call him once in a while!

Chel Bell's picture

Submitted by Chel Bell on Mon, 03/02/2009 - 8:49am

the skids are old enough to take some responsibility of calling their dad, especially returning phone calls! My DH does have court order visitation, he is supposed to be able to have them 3 weeks in the summer (BM still gets her CS for that time) and 2 weeks at christmas, or Feb. break. is how it got set up before we moved. DH is responsible for all travel costs (we moved, so that is understandable), but the big catch is, BM has full control, and uses that to her advantage. First it was getting them to the airport and back that was an issue, then it was~ ta da CLOTHING~ as they live in Florida and we now live in Mass. BM said that if it was cold when they were coming, she was not sending them with any clothing, or suitcases, as we should buy them things they needed. She wrote all this in a e-mail, so we saved it, and told her to forget it then, as we could tell that she did not want them to come, and would screw it up somehow, and DH would be out on the cost of the tickets, and seeing them. That was a year and a half ago, and now BM goes around telling all who will listen how we abandoned the skids, and don't care, and they think we are assholes. (yet to hear my SS call us that, SD does not even know whats goin on.) So back to present time, my DH says as of yesterday, we are not going into any further debt w/ skids, and if having them come here becomes mission impossible with BM then to forget it, and they will just have to wait till we can come down there to Fl. As of that e-mail the other day that MIL sent to us, with what BM had said, ....it upset my DH (and me to) pretty bad. He sees that nothing ever really changes, and does not want to speak to BM as of right now, he can already imagine the crap she'll want to pull now. He is happy about the myspace, and feels that it will take away some of the isolation that he has been feeling, and help make things easier, so he wount feel so upset about the distance. He just wants to communicate with his kids.....not much to ask! "We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."~ Randy Pausch