What a piece of $#@%!

What kind of mother doesn't stay with her child when he is having surgery? There is nothing that would have kept me from the hospital when my youngest had surgery. And his was even more minor than tonsils!

Stuff like that makes me so angry. I swear some folks just shouldn't be allowed to breed!

Brings back my own fond memories of all the times when BM won't take any of her PTO when the skids are sick. Instead she chooses to not answer her phone and let DF leave work (unpaid) to take care of the kids. Another fond memory also comes to mind: when BM lied about making SS3 a dentist appointment and never did.

What the hell is wrong with these mothers?

I have to be honest and say that I thought I was the only one that ever went through stuff like this. I have been with my DH for 3 years now. At the time his dd was 3 and hadn't seen her mother in about a year or so. She was in jail from stealing his truck out of his garage and using to rob a couple of places (she was on drugs at the time). Because she was entering some drug classes she was released early. From the moment she was release she has given us hell!!! We have been back and forth to court mulitple times and my dh is so over the fighting that he has given up and basically given her most of what she wants when she wants. The BM has had about 3 different husbands in the last 3 years and is now on her 3rd bf in 2 months. She has 7 kids by 6 different men. She has lost all parental rights to one child already and 2 others live with their father.
My sd had a cyst in her neck removed last November...her mother never even showed up let alone remembered the date she was having the surgery. She never called to check on my sd and couldn't give her medicine when she did have her during her visit. When we asked the bm why she never called us to see how she was doing the bm told us she was waiting for us to call her and let her know how things went. UNBELIEVABLE.
My sd has come home with lice multiple times and has been eaten up by fleas. This past weekend we picked her up and come to find out that 2 of her 100 cats have infections in their eyes. Both of my sd's eyes were so swollen and she had only had one shower all weekend. We had to take my sd to the docs to get meds and find out if she has pink eye. If I didn't mention it, I have an 11 month old too. I can't imagine how horrible it would be for a baby to get pink eye. The bm never mentioned anything to us about this and when we picked up my sd her mother was at work and left my sd with her new bf. She never even thought to take her to see a doctor she just lets us deal with it.
She has ruined everything we do and is constantly trying to better us. I'm not even competing with her. She just tells me I'm not the sd's mother and I need to stop acting like it. Where does she get off telling me what a mother is. I'm the one that takes the sd to every doc appt (including her vaccinations she never had as a baby), every dentist appt, makes sure she gets to and from school every day, takes her to every event at school, shows up for awards, takes her to school and checks out her class room on the first day, goes to parent teacher meetings and back to school night. I'm the one making sure she gets to her after school activities and makes sure she eats, gets her homework done. I can't count the number of things I have done for my sd...she would never go on vacation if it wasn't for me and my family. I'm so tired of the bm calling CPS on us and telling me what a horrible person I am. Every visit she has the bm is working the entire time and tells us that it doesn't matter if the sd gets to see her bm she just likes being at her house. GIVE ME AN F'ING BREAK!!!!!!!!!!
I can honestly say I have never hated anyone so much or ever wish so many horrible things on one person!!!!! I'm at my wits end and don't even know what to do anymore. I have no relationship with my sd anymore. She comes home every weekend and tells me stuff that her bm says about me. I know its not the sd fault but I'm tired of getting let down and hurt. I'm sick and tired of my dh not sticking up for me more with her and fighting harder to get the bm out of the picture. I also can't beleive our court system lets stuff like this go. Our judge's philosophy is "a bad parent is better that no parent"!
I think I need help...

I understand why my husband's ex is awful to me. I think it's a combination of insecurity, jealousy, and misplaced anger.

But I'll never understand how, as a mother, she justifies her actions towards her own children.

When the kids decided to move in with us, she just wrote them off.

I think both parents should be there. My BF wasn't told about his son getting his tonsils out, he was called afterwards by a very stoned 4year old. He wasn't given the opportunity to be there if he wanted to and that hurt him. Just like when she put SS in a psych unit for a week without telling BF, it's not fair to him to be there for his son.

I do think the part of not giving the insurance card is total crap!! I don't understand why a parent would be ok with their child being in pain when they don't have to be.

Good for your DH for being with him!!