I started with the chore list in ernest. It was going fine until my DH said it wasn't fun for SS's and did they really have to help clean the house. GRRRRRRRR! Needless to say, the SS's stopped immediately and I ended up doing what needed to be done. I was pissed!!!!!!

To give some background, I clean a room a night after work in order to give me my weekends clear to play with the family or to work on a special project or whatever. For this summer's visitation, I worked out a chore schedule for me and the boys so that they would have Fri, Sat and Sun with no chores other than maintaining their bedroom and dishes. I really don't think it is much. For example, yesterday was kitchen and dining room so one was supposed to vacuum (including the edges)and mop, and one was supposed to pick up stuff and put in the correct place and wipe off counters, cabinets, drawers, etc. Once they know what is expected and what clean really means, these chores should only take 15-20 minutes a night. Not huge.

Last night, I asked SS10 to also get the glass cleaner and wipe of the windows in the doorway in the dining room because there was finger prints on it. That is when DH had to interfere and say "What are you making them do?" To which I answered, "Clean the dining and kitchen". He argued with me that it was too much and that he didn't know cleaning the windows was part of cleaning the kitchen (duh, if there are fingerprints they don't just disappear). He said that if they have to do chores every night that it wouldn't be any fun for them to come over to our house. All of this he says in front of the kids. So I hear, "I'm done" and the boys quit.

I finished the jobs and went to get DH alone so I could talk to him and explained that I had brought the chore list to him 2 weeks ago and showed him exactly what was expected and he said ok. That once they know what clean is, it will take them all of 15-20 minutes to do it. That just because they are visiting us does not mean they are on vacation to be waited upon. I asked him if they are guests or a part of the family and he said family. I said then they need to have chores. I said that by arguing about it in front of the boys, if I make them continue I am the bad guy and that he needs to step up (yeah, right). I also said that they need to learn how to keep a house unless he plans on having them live at home 'til their 40. I also said these are the same chores that BD2 will be doing as she gets older and asked what is he going to tell her...that boys don't have to or that he loves the boys more? A little out of line I know, I was livid.

He ended up saying the chores were fine and that we would see how the week goes. I don't know what that means, but I can almost guarantee that his boys will be too fragile to handle the vacuum or duster by next week. After all, how can they be expected to clean up a house when they have never been taught and no one is allowed to teach them?

You want to know what the funny part was. After the boys quit, DD2 came in and said "I help Mommy" and tried to mop the floor. She didn't do a great job, but she put more effort into it than both boys combined and she's two. How sweet!

Tonight is the living room. Vacuuming and dusting...it might be too much.