I am feeling so sad! My gay bf was right when he said I was too fabulous to marry. I love my husband but how I wish it was just us two. My advice to women who meet good guys and say they only have the kids every other weekend is no they do not it is a lifetime commitment and you they never go away. Their past lives in their present. I am just fortunate enough to say I did not let my youth go to waste I married at 40 and lived up my single years without a care in the world. Travel, shoes, fine dinning and a fabulous group of friends. I know this my sound superficial to many and even though I had an amazing single life I always felt something was missing......that better half. He is indeed a great man not just a father but a dad which makes my situation difficult. It is hard for a single woman who never wanted kids to adapt to this. I thought if I married someone with kids my uterus would be off limits and I would not have the pressure of having to give him one. Well there are other pressures and shortcomings. I sometimes wonder if I was not meant for love or do my selfish needs get in the way. I am sooo sad right now. I dont want a divorce but I also do not want to feel the way I do. His ids are not an asset but a burden yes i said it!! I am financially independent and have a great career and not to mention not bad looking for a 40 year old. At this moment i feel like my life is soooo boring so mundane. I am fortunate enough to have a husband that is confident enough to be ok with me traveling without him (kids dont allow him to afford it) he knows it makes me happy .....plus when he said he came with a package I too said I came with one: A travel package. I love hosting, socializing and fine dinning and I get to plan my escapes when he has his kids so it works out but when my feelings are not validated I am not sure this is worth it. I am the alpha female in this ordeal. I pay most of the bills and it allows him to splurge a little on his kids and somehow I think he does not see it. We lived together for two years and I was never made to feel second best but now since we married in June I am feeling it. His kids are not that bad if not I would have never married him,. I have read blogs from many of you and i have it easy but why is this so hard!!