So we finally talked about "parenting the kids". :jawdrop:

My husband agrees that there should be a set of house rules (especially if his son moves in) and we are going to sit down and figure them out together and then present them to the kids. I just hope we can agree on what those rules will be, I am optimistic.

We also talked about the disciplining of each other's children. I basically told him that we should stick to our own kids but discuss things that come up between each other. He seemed very agreeable, I just hope we keep it up. I can tell his feelings have been hurt because he told me he wanted her to feel like she was his daughter. I tried to explain that that may happen in time and not to push it. I think he got the message and is stepping back a bit from her as a "dad" figure. I told him too, that I felt that his daughter (shes only 4) didnt listen to me and he said he understood and would talk to her from now on. He also seemed to understand my need to be respected in the house and he said he wouldn't tolerate his kids being rude to me. I said I expected the same from daughter towards him.

I feel like I made some progress today and I feel better about things, thanks to the advice I got here. I realize this is a work in progress, but I can take a small victory here right?