Thanks everyone, i do know i need to get out, i really have no where to go!! And i did go and try and press charges against her but our local police said that it was an unfair fight two against one so me and my daughter are both labeled as agressors, they will take a statement but no charges can be pressed. i went to the District attorneys office to see what rights i have and was told none. Now her BM is harrassing me by phone and I am under the control of a bail bondsmen not to leave my county until this court date is heard in May. This person knows she has me over a barrel! I am afraid for my life and my daughters. I dont have an avenue here that i can take. Everything we have is in his name, my car, my daugthers car, and the house everything, Him and his daughter have their names on their stuff. Yesterday the SD went and put a new locking door handle on her bedroom and locked her poor dog in there from 7 am until she strolled in at 5- even animal control said it wasnt long enough and it had food and water but had to use the bathroom on her floor, she is filthy and smells!! I really appreciate your advice guys and i know it might sound harsh but i really need to get a backbone and do what is right for me.

Thanks, when her parents were getting divorced they put her in counseling, and the counselor said it was a waste of time cause she told so many lies she kept tripping herself. So the counselor said dont bring her back. I know there is something wrong with her, she is a dark child, she lives in sex chat rooms about vampires and demons. That alone is enough for me to take her somewhere, but if she were mine, i would. My kids are pretty normal considering what we have been thru. At Christmas we went on vacation to visit his family and then drove across the country to visit mine, we were in my van. The week with his family was tolerable we did a lot of sight seeing and museums, when we arrived at my families house on Christmas Eve---him and his daughter packed up their stuff and drove off and left me and my daughter 1000 miles from home, because she said i didnt want her to see her mom at the holiday ( we traded visitation and she was there for Thanksgiving) So, we were alone, with no vehicle, no money and in a blizzard. I had to borrow money, and a car to get home. When we got here, she told me to go back, that there was a reason they left us there. I cant imagine an adult talking to someone that way and this 17 year old ---unreal. I have no one to talk to cause daddy doesnt believe me, he said i make things up to try to get her to leave. I personally said i would never tell him to choose between us, but its come to that. I fear my life and my daughters, we have to lock our doors at night and check all our tires and brakes in the morning before leaving, we dont eat food unless we open it and make it, no one should have to live like this.
The police dont believe me, they said she wouldnt lie about getting beat, when will they wake up, i agree that is why kids end up killing, they are allowed to. i will never love anyone as much as i love her dad, he has a good heart when she isnt around, my daughter had cancer as a baby, and SD tells her she wishes she would have died, does it ever end?

We live in a military town, and if you have a military ID, you are GoD, there are no laws for these people. I would love to shoot her dont get me wrong, but spending my life in jail for getting rid of something so pathetic doesnt appeal to me either,
I told my hubby tonight i want to move out and that i deserve so much better, and he said lets pack up and move, leave the kids behind and live for us, what does he think that will solve? Running away doesnt seem to be an answer to something so serious. This girl will be out on her own in society in a year, what about other honest people, she stops at nothing, she really needs to be admitted somewhere to help her, i need to know if anyone has had their stepchild admitted and what it takes, I am afraid for people in her future! I am just relieved to know that i am not alone in this.. there has to be some steps to take...RIGHT?

I guess with all the advice i am going to set up a video camera, i do have someone usually come over when her dad is at work, i cant handle the idea of going to jail again over lies. Our neighbors watch the house and listen carefully now also. I am not a jail person, i dont fit in with that crowd. As for her room, she put a lock on it and only gave her dad a key, I have no access to her room and the police told me that it is considered breaking in if i go in there, law enforcement in this town sucks, they are a bunch of sissys carrying a badge. When she had a problem last year we took away her computer and cell phone, but her lying vindictive mother bought her a laptop and a new cell phone on her contract and the court told us that since we arent paying for it, we cant take it away. Its just one thing after another, my kids know their boundaries, they are respectful and both straight A students, my 14 year old has a job and my 18 just got accepted into 2 colleges and they have goals, my SD's only goal is to make my life hell so i will leave, she tells my daughter all the time that "its my dad not yours, dont talk to him" now over jealousy my husband hasnt spoken to my daughter in 5 years, NOT ONE SINGLE WORD!
SD came home from school yesterday and decided that she wanted to park her car in the spot that i park mine, knowing full well that she was told not to do so, but I am worried that if i say something she will go off and i will end up in jail again, she has a plan to ruin my daughters graduation. And I will go to every extreme necessary to prevent that. I gave my husband an example yesterday of how she is ruining my life by lies and that i could do the same to him, i could go to the police and LIE and tell them that he beat me, raped me, any number of lies that could ruin his life and that could put him in jail, just what she is doing to me, he said but you wouldnt do that, you arent that type of person, HE JUST DOESNT GET IT!! I am so unsure of life now, i hate to leave to let that brat think she got her way and that she did get the opportunity to ruin my life, i hate that thought, but what else can i do.

Ok, on Friday my husband said he would drop the charges against me but not my daughter. So i told him to stick it where the sun dont shine, you hurt me you hurt my kids. Well, he asked me if we had it all dropped if we could work on getting our lives back in order, i do love him but i am so not ready to make a committment that i know will last a few days and then be right back to where it was , so here is what happened. I decided to play along til the charges are dropped on monday against me and my daughter, Friday night he wanted to go on a date, was great, we caught a play and had a nice dinner, just the two of us, Saturday night he had alot of homework for his college class, so we stayed home, had a few beers, listened to the jukebox and it was an overall good night. It was just him, me and my daughter. Well sunday rolls around and he said, lets all go out for a nice breakfast, ok, i told my daughter to get ready, him and i got ready, he told THE MONSTER to get ready, and she decided to take a long shower, so i told him that those of us that are ready should go and leave her here to let her know you werent kidding when you said lets get ready quick so we can beat the rush. We ended up waiting a half hour and then had to wait to get a table. So at this point, i am already getting pissed, but we get a table and before the menus arrive she is barking orders to him that she needs repairs on her car, and her computer and her jewelry cleaned,, WTH- my blood was boiling, then she throws the kicker to me, that she wont be going to her moms for visitation, that she plans on staying home for spring break. AND mister no balls said,,,oh ok. I AM SO MAD THAT I CANT SEE STRAIGHT, i know that this will never work as much as he says he plans on changing, then he ended the meal letting her order the biggest most expensive breakfast and not eating it. My kids were never allowed to do that, and her walking all over him just makes me sick, even though he allows it. But to make it all worse, he is out working on her car, called someone to fix her computer and whatever she says, he jumps. I am playing along til the charges are gone and then all i can say is ...IM GONE. He said just stick it out for one more year til this thorn in my side is gone, that is asking me to hang off a cliff for a year. i am a strong person but there is no way in hell i am that strong. My sanity is at stake here. I just dont get it, he is such a tough guy to me and everyone else but this little B***H runs him, and this has been only in the last two months. She laughs that he tries so hard to do what she says.