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BioHo - Martyr of the Groom part II

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I'm baaaaaaack! And SO happy to see my ankle bones again. Southern heat and Northern gal are not a happy match. My feet were so swollen, it felt like they were going to split open every time I flexed my sausage-y toes. Probably looked like a 147yo old bag whenever I minced my way up/down staircases. Ugh. 

What a trip! DH and I had an absolutely WONDERFUL time. On a happy note, we got to spend a lot more time with the newlyweds than we expected. On a crappy note, BioHo was bloody AWFUL. I barely know where to start, so I will take it day by day and will break it up into another blog or two.

 

MONDAY

We hit the road and drove allllll the way through. To our surprise, any traffic delays and backups were always the opposite direction in which we were heading, so we made good time and got to the house in the wee hours. The house was absolutely lovely! Four bedrooms, two sleeper sofas, and two YUGE fainting couches. If you want to count the normal sofa and two recliners, the house could actually sleep 18 people. A lot of room for two people, but my guardian angel must not have been drinking the day I found/selected this house.

 

TUESDAY

We slept late (Monday was sucky for us geezers!). Lunch plans with SS21 and stb-wife. It was a long lunch! We talked a lot, took our time, and lingered over coffee and dessert. The 'kids' reluctantly had to leave and do a bit of running before heading over to 'Ho's bungalow for dinner and overnights. The plan was for them to stay with 'Ho Tue and Wed nights and with DH and me Thu/Sat nights. DH and I decided to drive around for awhile before heading to the grocery store for some necessities. 

We were in the middle of grocery shopping when SS21 called DH to ask if they could stay with us Tue/Wed instead of 'Ho. Of course, DH said yes! We picked up a few more things to accommodate their stay and headed 'home' to meet them. Over some of Aniki's wicked Rum Punch, we got the story.

They left in the middle of dinner because 'Ho starting in on how SS21 owes her an apology (bunch of horsepuckey... https://www.steptalk.org/blog/aniki/bioho-martyr-groom-269380). SS21 suggested they discuss it later, after dinner. Well, how dare he! When 'Ho wants something, she wants it NOW. Cue a 'Ho Hissy! 'Ho threw down her fork (which bounced off the table and had to be swatted away by Mr. Pinhead so it didn't hit him in the face) and started screaming. SS21 did not go into details as to what 'Ho was yelling about; he simply said, "We'll stay somewhere else." He and stb-wife left to the sound of 'Ho's wine glass shattering in the background. Thankfully, their bags were still in the car.

 

WEDNESDAY

SD25 and fiance drove up from FL to stay at the 'Ho bungalow for the night. SD25 started a new job and Wed/Thu is her weekend, so they were only coming up to see the happy couple and be part of family pictures Thursday morning before heading back later that day. Late Wednesday afternoon, DH gets a call from SD25. Can SD25 and fiance stay with us tonight? Sure. (Thankfully, we'd gone a little overboard on fruit and snacks and had plenty to share.) We got the skinny over some of my blueberry lemonade. (SS21 and fiancee were out doing wedding stuff.)

SD25 and fiance arrived around 2pm. 'Ho was already drunk. Slurring, stumbling, belching drunk. SD25 asked where her brother and future SIL were.

"I'm not talking about your f*cking a$$hole brother and his wh0re. He owes me a f*cking apology, dammit! F*ck him. F*ck him! F*CK 'EM BOTH!!!"  ~'Ho SMASH~ (Say farewell to another wine glass!) Fiance grabbed SD25's arm and pulled her out of there. SD25 called from the car as fiance was driving away. 

Just after 7pm, Mr. Pinhead texted both SS21 and SD25 to remind the about family pictures in the morning.

 

To Be Continued...

Comments

caninelover's picture

This should be a reality show on TV.  Can we call Bravo and have them send some cameras?!?!

ICanMakeIt's picture

Oh I knew this was going to be an episode of "As The World Turns" Bio Ho Edition. Can't wait to hear more.

Your poor SKs. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I think ATWT may be a bit tame in comparison...

What 'Ho did/does to them breaks my heart. Thank God DH has always been a rock. 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Apparently so! Our main desire was to stay in an historic neighborhood and the house we chose, while huge, was practically a steal at the price we got. I hope the old gal was pleased to be full of happy people. Smile

CLove's picture

Egads.

That sounds horrible. 'Ho-rrible.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

CLove, mix together equal parts of whiskey, honey, and lemon juice. Shake that up really well and take a spoonful for your cough. Or put some in a mug and add hot water. 

Yes, she is. Sad and sickening.

WarMachine13's picture

Syph

I'm damn well ROLLING!! *lol*

p.s. does she??

bananaseedo's picture

Aniki, seems to me she outright abuses her husband, right?  As well as her kids.  She never disappoints w/these stories though lol- can't wait to hear the rest, hurry up and post it girl!  

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Yes, bananaseedo, she does. At least the skids are now old enough to walk (drive) away. Why Mr. Pinhead puts up with all of her BS, I will never understand. 'Ho is nukkin futz!

ndc's picture

OMG. 'Ho has serious wedding wrecker potential. She is SCARY! Is this going to be better than the graduation celebration meal? Surely nothing can be that entertaining.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Yes, ndc, it's going to be better. But we have to do those family pictures first and Evil Aniki is still laughing...

ndc's picture

Ooooh, not to rush you or anything, but stop laughing and HURRY.  I'm waiting with bated breath!

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

At least both SD and SS are mature/smart enough to just leave the situation than stick it out for hopes it will be better. Anxiously awaiting for the rest! 

Aniki-Moderator's picture

NYASM, it's such a shame they have to do that. 'Ho makes Mommie Dearest seem fairly nice...

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

you and your DH don't even have to try just be yourself and everyone prefers your household Smile

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I will be the first person to say that I effed up in the beginning. Coming from a military household and having raised 3 skids the way I was raised, I was trying to help. Finding STalk saved my marriage. I learned to disengage and let DH take the reins - even when I was biting holes in my tongue. Disengagement was the catalyst for Death of a Disney Dad. Thankfully, it did not keep the boys from wanting to come to our home and DH's even temperament and calm demeanor became something of a haven from 'Ho's crazy. Once I stopped trying to help parent (unless DH asked me for advice) and was simply Aniki, things seemd to fall into place. It was a rocky start, but I wouldn't change it for the world. After all, I have my STalk family!

NotYourAverageStepMama's picture

admit/realize. I can see how that would be difficult for sure. All it took was being yourself Smile The STalk family is definitely helpful in many many ways!

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Thank you. IMO, it's important we should be honest with ourselves about things like that and what part(s) we play. When I hurt SSnow18's feelings, he deserved my apology. And it was a real apology; not lip service. It was a turning point in our relationship. The skids still talk about that. *blush*

SteppedOff's picture

The "syph" has me belly laughing *biggrin*

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I may have spat a bit of water onto my computer screen when I read that.

Or maybe quite a bit...

islandgal2021's picture

OMG! That is one helluva deranged woman! Those poor kids of hers.. farrout I can't wait to hear more!! 

SteppedOut's picture

The syph and all the ho' comments have me rolling. 

But good Lord her poor kids. My mother was a narcissist, but this beast is something else. I have a hard time fathoming people can actually be like this. I am far from "snooty", but this individual is pure trash.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

'Ho has gotten worse over the years. She's a bitter, unhappy alcoholic. Lord knows why, but only 'Ho can make her own happiness.

There are funny moments and I try to make the most of them. However, the damage she inflicts is sickening. Neither of us have ever said anything bad about 'Ho to the skids and it's bloody hard. DH has done his best time the calm in the storm. Both SSs talk to him about what 'Ho says/does to them and he listens and gives advice when asked. The SDs talk to me about these things. It's difficult to Not say what a POS their mother is, but I try very hard to listen, make generic comments ("oh, that's too bad"...), and steer conversations and ask questions in ways that they make their own decisions. 

I maintain "Constant Vigilance!" because there is always a possibility they will reconcile with 'Ho. If that happens, DH and I hope the kids will remember that we never badmouthed 'Ho to them.

Kes's picture

Good grief - if I were in SS and his fiance's shoes, I wouldn't be going back to BioHo's place any time soon!  She sounds a veritable piece of work.  

thinkthrice's picture

Is the comic figure (martyr/madochist)  "family photos"  the next morning.... these new men of  HCGUBMs are a pathetic lot.

Keep it classy, BioHo.  Glad the skids and their SOs RUNNOFT from BioHo.

Rum punch recipe?

Aniki-Moderator's picture

I don't think BioHo knows how to spell 'classy', much less keep it so.

I always make Bajan Rum Punch. This is an old classic with a rhyme to tell you how to make it.
One of Sour, Two of Sweet, Three of Strong, Four of Weak.

What ingredients you choose for the sour, sweet, and weak are all up to you. Strong, of course, is rum. Weak is a combination of juices (for mine). It makes a lethal, but tasty punch. 

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

SS should hire a bouncer for the reception. If this is BioHos pre wedding behavior I can't imagine the shaningans she will pull during the actual wedding.

SteppedOff's picture

No thinking about it, Aniki, this Hody Ho would think one was talking about (class) school.

She is completely unhinged. From some of the episodes you have described since my time here...yikes...whatever the illness/disorder (syph...still hilarious to me) it appears not repairable even with a lifetime of therapy and meds. Add the self medicating booze...what a total all around disaster!

I sincerely am surprised that these children have grown up to be normal! Good on you and your husband for at least one stable, sane, functioning household for refuge. Make it a great weekend... Happy July 4th!

Aniki-Moderator's picture

SteppedOff, aDH and I have seriously been speculating that syph could be the case. Suffice to say, 'Ho has been going downhill for years and has turned into a miserable mental case. She was not like this in the beginning. IMO, her life has never gone the way she has attempted to orchestrate it. Instead of making the best of things, she has become bitter. Alcohol has always been an issue for her. The kids have many memories of her barfing down the side of the van while DH drove them home from any number of occasions. 

I'm surprised as well and attribute that to DH being that rock of stability they could cling to in a 'Ho storm. 

You, too, doll. Happy July 4th! *give_rose*