I completely went off on SD. I came home form work at lunch and she was still in bed. Dishes from her dinner last night were still in the kitchen and the dog was still in his crate. I was home for more than an hour and she never acknowledged I was there.

After work BD and I had plans for dinner. BD went to the house to take care of the dog and wait for me to get off work. SD was there but never acknowledged BD and didn't acknowledge me when I got home. We went to dinner and were getting ready to order dessert when BD gets a text form SD. "Did you guys leave?" A few minutes later I get the same text. I see my BD 2-3 times a month during the school year. I have no intention of letting SD drama ruin my time with BD.

When I get home BD leaves and I worked on homework. At 9:30 SD gets in the shower. Even though she's been told she needs to limit her shower to around 10 minutes she's in there for over 20 min. Hoping for at least warm water I go ahead and start my shower. After taking my cold shower I text (she's back hiding in her room) SD she needs to limit her showers since she not the only one who needs a shower and I don't appreciate getting a cold shower. The response: "I have to shave my legs and it takes at least 20 min. There is barely enough hot water for me and if you want to tell me something you should talk to me and not text." I told her it's very difficult to talk to her when she is locked away in her room and she should try to be more considerate since she has been home for the last two days she didn't have to use all the hot water at the same time I always take my shower. Her response. "I stay in my room because every time I open my mouth you try to kick me out."

I lost it. I've told her more than once that if she wants to live her she will follow the years. There have been two incidents where she ran to her moms because she didn't want to follow our rules. I made it clear she could follow the rules or leave.

I pretty much laid it all out there. I told her how inconsiderate and selfish her behavior is. How ridiculous I think missing more than 20 days of school is. How she does nothing to help around the house and only talks to us when she wants something from us. I wasn't diplomatic and I wasn't nice. Her attitude never changed, I'm unreasonable for expecting that she would try to save enough hot water for me.

I texted DH and told him what happened. I felt horrible for some of the things I said. He said I was right to tell her when her actions affect others. I expected him to be mad at me but instead he's telling me that he really thinks it's best for her to move out this summer. He feels like the only way to get her to start taking responsibility is for her to be on her own.