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Nasty SD15 ruined the Holidays once more

Not My Real Mom's picture

This whole past week and a half has been a blur. On Xmas Eve we went to my sister-in-law's house for her annual party. SD15 made deserts, etc. I helped her make them because she asked for my help. I carried her deserts in the house for her because she couldn't reach them on her side of the car. I greeted my SIL (DH's brother's wife) Merry Xmas. I asked SD15 where she wanted the deserts, upstairs near the kitchen or the family room where the party was set up. All of a sudden she just turn around, plopped her self on the sofa in the family room and asked me why I would ask such a stupid question. Being it was Xmas Eve, I kept my voice down and said since she had to set up some of the deserts she might want to do that in the kitchen. She told me to just put them anywhere. I brought them up to the kitchen and went downstairs and she screamed and wanted to know why I brought them to the kitchen. With her cousin sitting right there, SD15 said that I was annoying her and that I was stupid. I felt like crying but did not. The cousin looked at her like she was nuts. She went upstairs and asked SIL(DH's brother's wife)to pose in a photo in front of the tree. I went up to ask SD15 why she was being mean and she told me to just go away. By then my other SIL (DH's sister) heard everything and told me to be patient, SD15 will be out of the house at college in 2 years.

My other SIL (DH's brother's wife) loves to be the center of attention. She never comes over our house when invited, but wants everyone to come over her house to rave about her cooking. I used to have so much respect for her. Right in front of everyone she coddled SD15, stroked her hair and told her she could live with her. I thought that was really mean and there is no basis for it. I know that the two text back and forth all the time. SIL (DH's brother's wife) doesn't talk to adults, she seems to like the teens better. I think she'd better grow up. She's 51 years old. She also turns around and tells me that SD15 ought to be slapped for talking to me that way. I think they both need psychiatric help.

Of course on Xmas Day, SD15 did not say thank you for one single present.

On New Years Eve, DH and I were invited to a wedding. SS15 went to a friend's house to ring in the New Year. SD15 was going to be dropped off at her grandfather's. At six pm, when we were ready to leave, SD15 decides she wants Daddy to drive her to Times Square. She said her uncle could not take her. I nearly flipped. She's a monster. Anyway, DH said no way. We're an hour and a half away from NYC and there is no way anyone can get into the city. Miss "common sense" begs Daddy but he refused. Next thing you know, he's letting her invite some of her friends over (I was surprised she had any) because she'll not go to the party her brother is going to because there are freshman there. My SS15 told me that no one there likes her anyway. Anyway, we wound up staying home to keep her out of trouble.

Yesterday, DH told me he had to take SD15 to the hairdresser. SD15 came out of her bedroom and told DH she needed money (I guess she spent all the 400.00 she got at Xmas). I just rolled my eyes at him in disgust. She told him it was only for hair coloring, not a cut. I watched him pull out his wallet and give her 80.00. Two days before he gave her 20.00 in movie money. She must be into him for about 800.00 now in just these two weeks. Then he has the nerve to tell me he doesn't have enough money for us to go out to a nice dinner together. I've just about had it.

Sorry for ranting, I just had to get that out of my head.

I am waiting the two years out, biting my lip.

StressedOutMommy's picture

Sounds like my 16 year old step daughter, cept we got hit with three of thme doing this. We droped my two kids and his two kids at my moms, the first time since we have been together we went out on New Years with out kids, and they made my moms life a living hell, the only good kid was my BS, my BD was even a brat. I feel for ya...Hugs

Sita Tara's picture

I am so sorry your DH falls for this, and his family encourages her. I will have to tell you a tale of my DH regarding SD asking for only FIVE dollars the other day, for food at the all day basketball games she wanted to attend after hers was over. DH said, "Where's the 20 dollars your Great Grandma sent you for Christmas?" SD got mad, and stated she was saving that for something. DH said, "Bummer Dude..." (DH hates the term Dude, and only uses it because the kids toss it out all the time at us. So he was being sarcastic to SD- which she can dish out but never take.)

SD gets money for anything and it is burning a whole in her pocket to spend it. My sons got a ton of Christmas money from their SM's family (it's extreme in my opinion, but not nearly as much as you said your own SD got) and they know they have to choose wisely. I will not be giving them any money for extras, so they pace themselves.

Your DH will have to learn to just say no. If he doesn't, then SD will be ill prepared for a world where no one hands you anything without your earning it.

"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra