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Acceptance of a diagnosis

Love51's picture

Submitted by Love51 on Wed, 07/03/2013 - 11:29am

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Step Kids with Disabilities

I was wondering if any steps out there, in dealing with a atepchild with a ADD, ADHD, aspergers or similar diagnosis. What has been your expereince with your SO's acceptance of the diagnosis. My SS15 was diagnosed with aspergers when he was 6 and BM never told my SO. A lot is coming out now that my SO is involved with the IEP process and he is having trouble accepting the aspergers diagnosis. Partly because he wasnt included early on by BM and also because one of SS's teachers was more focused on SS's depression, OCD and emotional disturbance so SO focuses on the "emotional disturbance" as if that is easier to handle. If he was more open to it and learning about it, I think it would make things so much easier.

nothinforya's picture

Submitted by nothinforya on Wed, 07/03/2013 - 11:51am

Accepting it and understanding it are two different things, and both are hard. Is there a professional that SO could talk to about it? Maybe having someone to talk to would help him. Does SS have a therapist who would see SO alone and explain? Someone who also knows SS?

Love51's picture

Submitted by Love51 on Wed, 07/03/2013 - 1:40pm

You bring up a good point, the difference of accepting and understanding. I will think about that one more although I think he needs to accept it first before he can understand. SS is currently not in therapy, that would be part of the problem.

Starla's picture

Submitted by Starla on Tue, 07/09/2013 - 12:39pm

My DH felt guilty for SD's problems which wasn't allowing him to accept the diagnosis. Like suggested above, therapy for your DH. It was of great help for my DH and I tried to be supportive and accept his approach as he saw fit. It can take a lot of time and patience but if he is the right guy for you, it can be worth it. Smile

gaviotas's picture

Submitted by gaviotas on Thu, 07/11/2013 - 1:48pm

I do agree with therapy for dealing with such a difficult situation. It is not easy to accept and move on with a diagnosis, but he has to learn how to move on and help his son.
It will be a team-working issue, as the whole family will be involved in the therapy, not easy at all, and a long time process.
I will post my case, getting worse every day on my perspective.
Wish you the best, a lot of patience and hope you find the best professionals to support the family during the process