I am new to this and unfortunately i am here to vent and release my problems out. I would love for some seasoned people to give me advice or some type of understanding, prayer to the miracle god to help me.

I have been married for what will be 4 years which three our of the four years i have incurred 2 teenage boys from HELL. Now I am fully aware of what teenage boys do and what trouble they are capable of.
BUT i have NEVER known people to be so ungrateful, ingrates, &(*&S*&&S*&*S I could go on but i am so TIRED of this.
Mainly their Father literallys rolls out the red carpet and allows them to walk all over him, us and our home that we have so hard for. He accepts the comming home and all hours of the wee of the morning, alcohol and drug abuse, the disrespectful language and lack of home duties. Their father gives them the last chance, the last chance, the last chance. As much as we lay ground rules, it last 24 hours and its back to having. Adding to my frustration my husband is the one to initiate the changes instead of backing me up. Dont know if he is acting because he feels he needs to please them. The situation has gotten to the point where i dont speak to the boys for anything and my obligation is my marriage which i have put first. Husband however, puts the boys first it appears.
I am the main bread winner at home and support all; along with home duties, etc. I have talked calmly, nicely, respectfully, understanding to "bitch ghetto hood chick" on what my needs are and what i need from them to have a smooth and peaceful home.
I love my husband and i truly do despite the fact that the kids but a major wrench. Which BTW the oldest is 18 and the youngest turned 17. Being that i have voiced and am willing to throw the clothes in a garbage bag and out the door. Its a difficult situation. I would like some words of wisdom on how to cope with this instead of packing my bags and walking out the door.

Thank you and sorry for the language that was used.