Sports and ballet classes with Bm and DH
As I'm new to being a stepmom I'm trying to learn what's appropriate behavior that should occur between my DH and his ex-wife & children. I have found in the past I have over-thought and over-reacted to some things so I want to be sure I don't continue to.
My 4-year old sd has started ballet class but is very shy about going into the classroom. She's gone twice and today told her mom she wants her brother and her dad (my DH) to be at the class with her. When I picked up the kids today my ss said his mom said only him & dad will go to the class. I had no problem with DH going until hearing this. SS has a habit up making up lies & lately he has been very clingy to dad, so now I'm not sure if BM said it or if SS is jealous or something. DH says if he goes I go but I don't want to have a marriage where if he's around his ex I'm behind him holding his hand like his mommy.
I guess my question would be how do I address this issue with ss of lying and being clingy & do I even go to the class. Honestly I could care less unless mom really doesn't want me around then that seems weird to me. Thanks for listening.
Awww...they want to play "one
Awww...they want to play "one big happy family" that really isn't, huh? I see no problem if anyone can attend, including you...but if it's about only mom and dad and THEIR kids can attend, then they are sending the WRONG message. If they wanted to play one big happy family, they should have stayed married.
My thoughts exactly!!! Looks
My thoughts exactly!!! Looks like BM would be embarrassed if I attended as dad's wife while she's just the mom & ex-wife. I don't want to smother DH but as I told him we're a family...she's not his family any longer. Oh and SD practices at mom's house anyways...DH never watches her practice so why would he need to be there? Pisses me off!!
Neither do I... looks like
Neither do I... looks like ex-wife is playing games.
Well dad (DH) couldn't attend
Well dad (DH) couldn't attend this time so when BM picked up the kids SS asked if my son & I could go and BM said no that would just confuse sister. So apparently BM wants only my DH but not me and my son there. I told SS in front of BM that next time I would go and BM that my son would be really bored. I wouldn't make a big deal over it but the fact that BM expects only them and my DH to attend is BS so now I will go!! DH has already told me if he goes I'm more than welcome to attend. How would me attending confuse SD?? What a crock of bs.
Both my girls do ballet, and
Both my girls do ballet, and the normal practice here is that no-one watches as it makes the kids self-conscious!!
When my youngest started (age 3) she was very shy and often I had trouble getting her to go in (but she really wanted to dance so that was the carrot LOL - it was just getting her to go into the room that was the hard bit)
But once in there she was fine, and she was better behaved and came out of her shell more when I WASN'T there.
So, I see no need for ANY of the parents to sit in on the lessons!!
BM is trying it on, go, watch, (be bored stupid LOL)
That's the same issue my SD's
That's the same issue my SD's going through...she's very shy. BM loves ballet & did it herself for many years but I would not keep pushing my daughter to go. She's tried 4 times to get her in the class & SD won't go in. My idea is to try again in few months but BM keeps trying thinking DH will attend & all will be ok. But, during the next practice DH & I have a date so when the next class occurs everyone will be going, including me...only because BM doesn't want me & my son there. Even DH thinks BM's reason for not wanting me there is stupid.