OK, so I am in an interesting position.

When my first husband and I got together, I soon found out that he had a child with another woman, and that woman was still in his life, the "in his life" details were very sketchy at the time. He told it was over, she was writing to me telling me I stole him from her and that they were an item. Around the same time I found out I was pregnant and that pretty much cemented things for me. Anyway, for the first few years, my first husband did not have much to do with his first born, no matter how much I pushed and pleaded for him to take an interest. The mother HATED me. I could never quite understand her position, but there it was. My first husband treated that first born terribly, and wound up giving parental rights up when the kid was 8.

Now I am the ex. He remarried and lives 2 blocks away with the new woman. To this point I have not had any real issues with his new life with his new wife. She is good to the kids, and when he is away on business trips I let her get the kids on what would be his time. She is pregnant now.

That bothers me. I don't like that is bothers me. I have moved on and remarried myself. I don't know if part of the reason it bother's me is because one of the reasons he wanted the divorce is that he didn't want any more children and I did. He never really wanted any children. It was only a niggling little bother at first, the kind I can overcome pretty quickly, but then I found out they were going to name the baby if it was girl after my ex and I's daughter who passed away at 17 months, 14 months before he decided he didn't want to be married anymore or have any more kids. Now that really bothers me. The thing is our daughter was his also. Can I really tell him I would rather he leave her name out of it? Is that fair?

These feelings I am having, what can only be termed as resentment, are making me think back to the first born. The mother was probably feeling much the way I do right now. Maybe I can understand a little of what it had been like for her now.