LOST
I will try to make this short. My DH and I have been together for 5 years, cohabitating 3 years, and married 7 months. I have 7 year old DD from previous marriage, 11 year old SS from one BM, and 6 year old SD from another BM. SD BM has been a pain since day one. She has tried in every way possible to make his life miserable. Once I came into the picture I was able to help him put up a barrier so that she was unable to be so much in our lives. We married in March and decided to have her first child together. We found out in August and we were ecstatic. Then, the SD BM decided that she wanted to switch custody arrangements with her having visitation on weekends and us having her during the week. This was a month ago and it has been a disaster. I'm miserable everyday and we now live seperate lives. I feel like a single mother again and being pregnant is just making it worse. I don't want SD here not right now anyways just because it is what she wants. I don't know what to do and if my marriage can make it thru this. Please help!
That's how I feel. I didn't
That's how I feel. I didn't explain that her house is not the best situation for the SD, but the situation is as bad as it always has been. We had offered twice this year to change arrangements, but BM refused. So we went on with our plans for the year. The timing of it is horrible and is the issue that I have. He looked at it as an opportunity. He did ask me, but I cried for weeks when it happened and told him I was unable to make a decision. So he made the decision. I guess I'm partially to blame, but he sees what it is doing to us and he is pushing the papers thru to be permanent. I feel like he is just trying to make me accept it and that is not happening.
No matter what, you need to
No matter what, you need to take care of you right now. Whatever that means, you simply have to do it.
My SD17's BM couldn't face the fact that we got married. Immediately, she tried to kidnap SD (who was 8 at the time). Of course, we took her to court. It was ugly, and it was long. I had gotten pregnant 2 months after we got married. For the duration of my pregnancy, drama swirled, hatred built, accusations against me flew, and the list goes on and on.
Needless to say, my child was due in January. The doctor put me on bedrest in late October. The custody issue continued to heat up...one day in mid-November (while I am supposed to be on bedrest) DH visits his lawyer and forgot to bring some documents. He called me to bring them to him. I reminded him I wasn't supposed to get up. He replied, "It will just take a minute. We aren't too far away." Took him the documents, then my baby stopped moving. Rushed to the hospital, the doctor came in and said, "Guess what?? You're having a baby tonight."
Thank GOD she is whole, and healthy, and happy. The stress of DH and his ex caused this. And, then, I lost 4 more. Stress plays a huge role in pregnancy. Please, for your baby, take care of YOU.