Annoyed!!

Mpjcmom's picture

Grrr....I just checked the mail on my way home from a long day at work. There was an envelope addressed to SD12, from our bank, with what feels like a credit card in it. So I presented it to DH and asked him about it. He said that he decided to get SD12 a debit card for her 13th birthday, which is at the end of this month. WTF?!? Isn't 13 kind of young for a debit card?? His daughter doesn't even babysit or anything....has no income of any kind that I am aware of. He said he wants to teach her how to manage money. Hmmm....interesting, since my DH is currently unemployed! He is always talking to me about how we need to watch our money, etc. So, I'm thinking, is this really the right time to open an account for SD12?? I'm sorry, but that kid annoys me to no end! Her grades are mediocre, she has NO outside activities or interests (except boys), and lately I have been watching her Twitter account....she has been throwing the "F word" around freely online! She already has an iPhone, and now she's being rewarded with a debit card. She does nothing to earn any of it. Ugh!! Thanks for "listening" to my vent....comments welcome!

Craving Normality's picture

If her dad is unemployed how does he plan to make money available for her debit account?

theoutsider's picture

He does know that a debit card can be used as a credit card some places and she can buy things she does not have the money for, cause lots of over draw charges that he would be liable for???

Huge BAD idea!

I work in merchant services, and we recomend that parents who want to teach money responsibility to children use CASH, it is finite and definate. Swiping a card And paying for something for $15, is not the same as seeing $15 LESS in your billfold...

Knowing there is an end to money, teaches about money.
Making a child perform a task to get money, teaches about money.
Making the child SAVE money and not spend it, teaches about money.

I am really sorry your DH did this, it's ASKING for headaches.

hereiam's picture

Yep, and debit cards do not have the same protection as credit cards if lost or stolen, and fraudulently used.

theoutsider's picture

It's a common misunderstanding, I don't know where that rumor started.... But yes, if out has the logo of one of those big three on it, the credit card processors have to protect it just the same as a credit card.

hereiam's picture

Absolutely ridiculous. A piece of plastic, whether a debit card or a credit card, does not teach anybody how to manage money.

And he's unemployed, too? Perfect time to teach her that when you don't have a job, you don't get to spend money. How's that for money managing 101?

katielee's picture

Debit cards are no fun if there's no money available on them;) At most banks you can opt out of allowing purchases when you don't have the money to cover them. You can swipe them all day long, but the purchase won't be approved without the cash.

luchay's picture

Yes, my older girls got their first (usable) bank accounts when they got their first jobs!

That brings up a ? I may ask on the teenagers forum....

momto3's picture

One of my DD's is almost 13 & I would NEVER give her a debit card...she's lucky she even has a cell phone, since she's not terribly responsible. He is making a huge mistake.

DD18 opened a checking account when she was 17 & had a job. She didn't opt for a debit card until about 6 mths after she opened it. She is really good about checking the balance, but at 13 she wouldn't have been.

Mpjcmom's picture

Thanks to everyone for your comments! I feel very validated to know it's not just me who thinks this is a terrible idea!! I didn't get a debit card/account for my BS18 until he got his first job at 16. My exDH recently got one for our BD15. He and his wife sometimes pay her for chores around the house, good grades, etc. and deposit the money in her account, which works for me. Also, my BD15 is a straight-A student and a very responsible girl! SD 12 is most definitely not. Luckily DH and I have separate accounts, so you can be sure I will NEVER deposit a cent in her account!! DH has some money saved, but it makes me sick to think he's going to put that in SD's account so she can go blow it on crap. He pays BM plenty in child support already. Ugh....this blended family stuff is so hard. I love my DH, but had I known then what I know now.... Sad

Jellybeam's picture

How bout making the kid EARN money to put on one of those VISA gift cards, so it has a LIMIT, so if she loses it, YOU"RE NOT SCREWED?
WOW.
Shit!
More bullshit like this to look forward to with my entitled one.
Her dad told SD when she was 10 that if she kept getting good grades, he would buy her a brand new Mustang, any color her lil heart desired.
GOOD THING DH NEVER DOES WHAT HE SAYS HE WILL.
Hello, dude, I'm your wife and I have never had a Brand New Car! I guess if I wanted one, I could buy it myself, but I personally feel that brand new cars are a ripoff. 1-2 year old cars-way more value in my opinion. It's late and I'm rambling..

Mpjcmom's picture

Wow, a brand new Mustang?!? Nice! I want one!! Yeah, I dread something similar here when SD12 starts driving. Ugh. Oh well....my SD is NOT here this weekend, and for that I am very thankful!! Smile